In High Gear
by TwoTwiMoms
Summary: The world of fast cars and easy women is what race car driver Edward Cullen is used to. When Bella Swan is hired to promote him and his racing team his rookie year she turns his world upside down. He struggles to keep his own secrets and let her into his world – will he succeed?
1. Chapter 1

**Thanks to our lovely beta, darcysmom for fixing our mistakes and her unending encouragement.**

**This compilation was written for the Fandom4Autism compliation and means a lot to us since twimom817's son was diagnosed with Aspergers, which is a form of Autism. He has overcome so much since being diagnosed almost four years ago. He still has some bad days but he is just like any other seven year old boy. He plays soccer, loves math and his 3DS and the teachers say he may even be tested for the mentally gifted program. **

**Thank you to all the authors and readers who donated not only money but their time for this amazing cause.**

**Autism isn't contagious ignorance is. Please take the time to get educated about Autism. **

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"Oh, Bella … I think you've done a wonderful job considering all the things you had to do for me."

_Thank fuck_.

I'd been busting my ass on the account for Brandon Designs – Alice's interior design business. It was my first major solo promotions account. I'd been with Concordia Promotions for nearly three years. I'd put in long hours and done everything that was ever asked of me. I put in one hundred and ten percent and crossed my fingers that all my hard work would pay off.

It did. I was asked to work on promoting Brandon Designs. I had several meetings with Alice and from the get go we clicked. We met for drinks and chatted about her expectations and my presentation was right on par with what she wanted. In the end, we were both happy and well rewarded for our efforts – Alice's business was booming and I had been presented with my next challenge; creating a promotions package for an up and coming race car driver and the company he races for; Cullen Motorsports.

"Bella, I have faith in you." My boss smiled. "You did an outstanding job with Brandon designs, and there is no doubt in my mind that you will do the same with Cullen Motorsports."

He handed me a thick file and promised that everything I needed to know about my client was in that folder. I trudged back to my desk and picked up the phone to call Alice. She was not only a client, she was a friend and I couldn't think of a better person to call.

I explained to her my next account and she squealed with happiness.

"Bella … this is a big deal. HUGE! Cullen Motorsports? They've been in the racing business practically since NASCAR began. Your boss really has faith in you if he's handed you something this big."

"Alice, what if I can't handle it? What if it's too much?"

"Bella, you are incredible at your job. You go that extra mile above and beyond anyone's expectations. Besides, my fiancé works for Cullen Motorsports and he says that Mr. Cullen is the nicest guy you'd ever meet. As a matter of fact, Jasper's trying to talk me into going over to the track tomorrow to watch some of their testing. It's boring and I'm not all that interested in it but you could come and keep me company and maybe even meet some of the people you'll be working with."

"Oh, I don't know. I need to read over their file and see what it is that they're asking me to do for them."

"So do that tonight and come with me tomorrow. Please?"

"Alice …" I groaned.

"I'll take you for margaritas afterward …" she sing-songed.

"Ugh … all right, I'll go."

All I'd ever seen of Lowe's Motor Speedway was in photographs. Most were from the newspaper and only a small glimpse of the bigger picture. As Alice parked the car and we stepped onto the infield of the race track I was in awe. I felt so small surrounded by the enormous track and the grandstands that loomed over us.

"Bella … come on," Alice giggled.

I clung to the pass they'd given us at the gate when we came in. We were expected to wear it all times; it was our authorization to be in the infield and down in the pit area.

The night before, I stayed up for hours reading through the thick file I'd been given. I even googled NASCAR and tried to learn as much as possible. I wanted to have some bare bones knowledge when I met with the Cullens. I called their offices first thing that morning and made an appointment to meet the following day with a Carlisle and Esme Cullen; the patriarch and matriarch of the Cullen Racing empire.

As Alice and I walked, we passed by an eighteen wheeler painted with a large, colorful '9' on the side.

"There's my girl," I heard a smooth voice say in a slight southern twang.

"Hey Jazzy," Alice said sweetly as she made her way toward him. "This is my good friend, Bella. She's the one who worked so hard to make my business a booming success."

I blushed seven shades of red and looked down at my feet.

"Aww, Miss Bella don't be like that," Jasper said softly. "I saw quite a bit of your work and I must say that I'm mighty impressed with everything you did for Alice. That's why when Carlisle said he was going to be using your company to promote Edward, I suggested you. If anyone could market this guy, I'd bet it would be you."

Just as I was about to ask why he thought that, a handsome blond man walked out of the trailer and clapped Jasper on the back and asked him if he was ready to go. Jasper nodded and he motioned for us to follow them toward the pit area.

"Carlisle, this lovely lady here with my Alice is Bella Swan, the PR agent you requested from Concordia."

"Ahh, Miss Swan, nice to meet you. We're very informal around here so I hope you don't mind if I call you Bella?" He asked.

I shook my head sharply in response.

"I hear we have a formal meeting scheduled for tomorrow?"

"Yes, sir."

"Bella, I already told you we're informal here." He chuckled. "It's Carlisle, and I must say that it's a delight to meet you, Jasper here sings your praises over the work you did for his fiancée. I'm thrilled that we'll be working with you."

"Thank you, Carlisle. I'm flattered that everyone thinks so highly of me. All I can say for myself is that I give everything I've got – I put my heart and soul into my work because I want everyone to be pleased with the outcome."

"That's good to know, Bella." He smiled.

When we reached the pit area, Carlisle smiled and offered Alice and I each a headset.

"I don't know if you've ever been to a race track before but it can get a bit loud. These will allow you to hear Jasper and Edward's communications while they're testing."

Carlisle directed us to a few chairs that they'd set up along the infield side of the wall. Alice and I chatted for a few minutes while we waited for them.

"Carlisle … where the hell is he? He was supposed to have been here twenty minutes ago." Jasper growled.

"I'm right here God dammit. I said I was going to be here and I'm here. So let's get this fucking show on the road."

I watched as a handsome, dark haired man approached Carlisle, snatching a helmet from his hands and jumping over the low concrete wall before another word could be said. He stopped at the door to the car and turned to look toward Alice and me. Our eyes met and he gave me a menacing look before crawling into his car.

Carlisle sighed and looked apologetic as he glanced at Alice and me before climbing up and joining Jasper up on the box he was so precariously perched on.

I put on my headset just as the car was rumbling to a start. The crew members had barely finished securing the net on the window as Mr. Attitude floored it and sped off.

"Yo, Ed." Jasper's annoyed voice spoke through my headset. "Do you think you can manage to get that stick out of your ass and do what we need you to do today? If you can't, just bring her back in and park her by the hauler. You can deal with your dad and brother on your own."

"Fuck you, Jazz. You just sit up there on your pretty little box and do your fucking job. I'll sit in this piece of shit my brother built and attempt to keep it in one piece."

"Edward! Jasper! That's quite enough." Carlisle's stern but calm voice came over the radio. "If you two want to succeed you need to learn to work together. If you can't then you're both out of a job. Edward, I need fifteen laps out of you. Do you think you can manage that or will I have to resort to a backup driver?"

I heard a grunt and that was the end of the conversation.

"I can't believe that people actually like watching a pack of cars make a bunch of left hand turns," I said as I sipped on my third margarita.

"Me either! I think watching paint dry would be more entertaining!" Alice giggled.

"Ladies," Jasper greeted us as he sat down next to Alice.

"I see you've got a head start on me." he smiled.

"Good God, Jazzy. Do you have to work with that prick on a daily basis?"

"Who? Edward?"

Alice eagerly nodded.

"Unfortunately, yes but he's not like that all the time. He was especially pissy today for some reason."

"He didn't look too happy to be there that's for sure." I snorted.

"He's a moody son-of-a-bitch. I've only been working with him for a couple of months. Emmett's damn near had it with him. If he wasn't related to Edward; he'd probably kill him."

"Who's Emmett?" I asked.

"Carlisle's oldest son. He raced for a few years when he was younger, but he went to school and got himself a degree in engineering, so he's more involved with the development and building of the cars as opposed to racing them. He's a hell of a nice guy and sharp as a tack. His wife, Rosalie is also an engineer, and she works for Cullen Motorsports as well."

"And Edward?"

"He's cocky, arrogant and moody as hell. He's a hell of a race car driver though. He started out driving sprint cars on dirt tracks before moving over to open wheel racing. I think he did that just to piss off Carlisle and Esme if you ask me. He took a break from racing for a while to go to college. He's real secretive about what he did in college though. Not even Carlisle and Esme are sure. Anyway, for the past year he's been easing himself back into racing. Last year he drove part time for Carlisle's Nationwide Series team and this season he's going to be a full time Sprint Cup driver.

"He better be serious about it because Carlisle let a perfectly good driver go just so his golden boy could have a chance. Carlisle and I didn't exactly see eye to eye on that decision, and I made no qualms about voicing my opinion on it. Edward knows I wasn't happy about seeing Elliott go and I've been riding Edward's ass telling him he's got to prove to me that he deserves the chance that Carlisle has given him."

"I'm guessing that's why you boys had such a cheerful conversation this afternoon?" I giggled.

"I want you to know what you're walking into, Bella. Don't get me wrong – Carlisle and Esme are the nicest people you'll ever meet. They're good to their employees and treat them all like family but sometimes they sugarcoat things because they don't want you to see how bad things are. Edward is the perfect example of that."

"Well, thanks – I think. I'm supposed to meet with Carlisle and Esme tomorrow afternoon so I'll see for myself exactly what I'm getting into, and I'll go from there."

"Good luck with that." he smirked.

The following afternoon I walked into Cullen Motorsports and gave my name to the pretty blonde girl at the front desk. She was sweet, but you could tell that all the lights weren't on upstairs.

**EPOV**

Why couldn't everyone just leave me be and let me drive. Yesterday Emmett decided to make adjustments to my car which wouldn't have been a problem if the dickwad had asked me first. He thinks that just because he raced before he knows everything. Problem is, this isn't his car, and he's not the one behind the wheel.

Now today my parents think I need to speak to some PR chick about commercials and advertising deals. Like I give a shit about that stuff—I was here to do one thing and that was drive my damn car. I'm a racecar driver, not a male model.

I waved to Jessica as I walked past the receptionist desk and down the hall to Carlisle's office. I was late, and I knew I was going to hear shit about it later, but I really didn't care.

Not bothering to knock, I opened the door and all conversation stopped. Carlisle was behind his desk with a disappointed look on his face while Esme sat to his right with a blank expression on hers.

"Nice of you to join us, Edward."

"Can we get on with this?"

My father rose from his chair as did a woman who had been sitting in front of his desk. When I walked in I didn't even notice her but as she got up from her chair, I noticed. She had long mahogany hair that fell to the middle of her back just above a nice, firm ass. She had curves in all the right spots like a woman should have. Her legs seemed to go on forever, accentuated by the fuck me heels she was wearing.

"Edward, this is Bella Swan. Bella, my son, Edward Cullen."

When she finally turned to face me, I felt like all the air had been knocked out of me. This was the same woman that had invaded all my thoughts and dreams the day before. Her beautiful brown eyes, the shade of melted chocolate had caught my attention yesterday, captivating me and I had no idea why.

As my father cleared his throat I shook my head to clear my thoughts before extended my hand to hers. "It's nice to meet you, Miss Swan."

"Please, call me Bella."

"Bella …"

Her hand was warm, and when we touched I felt a rush I had never felt before. She had felt it too because her eyes widened before she slowly pulled her hand away.

"Now that introductions are done, shall we get down to business?" Carlisle asked, motioning us to take a seat.

"Bella, you came very highly recommended. I'd love to hear your ideas."

I rolled my eyes. My father was always the schmoozer.

"Thank you Carlisle. I hope to live up to the compliments," Bella said before turning to me. "We need to get you sponsors, get your face out there. A few have approached me with a high interest in you. All they require is few pictures with their product and maybe a commercial or two."

"Which ones?"

"Rogaine—"

"No."

"Tampax—"

"No."

"Viagra—"

"Hell, no!"

"How about Colgate or Visine so we can play off your better features since your attitude needs some work?"

I heard my mother try to hide her snicker behind her hand, but my Dad actually chuckled. I sent him a death glare before turning back to Bella.

"What about Calvin Klein?"

I sighed loudly, getting more frustrated by the minute.

"_Miss Swan_—"

"Bella."

"_Bella_, I'm a race car driver. I'm not here to strut around in my underwear for a commercial." _Although the thought of walking around half naked with Bella sprawled on my bed was becoming very tempting._

"Can't you find any sponsors who wouldn't emasculate me for supporting their product or have the need for half naked men?"

"I understand where you're coming from Edward, but sometimes we do things we don't like to do—like posing in our underwear or promoting Viagra for a commercial. You need sponsors. _Big _sponsors. Sponsors are what get you paid for driving that car. Commercials get the fans watching and coming to those races which make your sponsors happy."

"Fuck the sponsors. There's got to be someone who wouldn't want me to prance around looking like a girl."

"Edward … Miss Swan is telling you that these are your options … your _only_ options. You need to choose the lesser of the evils and that, Son, is something that you're just going to have to compromise on. You and Bella need to sit down and hash out this sponsor thing. We'll meet again tomorrow to talk about what you've chosen. Trust Bella, she's excellent at what she does, and she came highly recommended."

"Fine."

"How about we meet over dinner? We can enjoy some food while going over some more options. I'm sure we can work something out that works for you, Edward."

"Whatever."

"Edward … I know you may not like me or think what I'm doing isn't needed but nevertheless we need to work together on this. Do you think you can do that?"

Four hours later and I was sitting at a table in Pueblo Grande having dinner with Bella talking, about _sponsors_. There was no use arguing about what couldn't be changed so I decided to enjoy dinner with a beautiful woman while trying to agree on a sponsor.

I was willing to compromise, but there was no way in hell I was going to promote anything that made me a lesser man. No matter how much money Viagra was going to dish out I was not even considering it. And Rogaine was out the question too, there was no way I would let anyone think my hair wasn't all natural.

So we were down to a few other choices for our main sponsor. After back and forth arguments we finally agreed on a sponsor, Dr. Pepper. I wouldn't have to parade around in my underwear or threaten my manhood. I just had to drink a few sodas and do a commercial here or there. Not that bad at all. I was happy and Bella was happy. It was a win-win situation for both parties.

"I'll contact Dr. Pepper tomorrow. They're going to want to film a commercial soon so it can be aired during the Daytona 500. I'll let you know when."

"Okay, as long it doesn't interfere with practice."

"Edward … everything will be worked around your schedule. Believe me when I say I'm here to help you not to cause you more problems.

"Fine."

"What about a foundation? Do you have one already?"

"I never really put any thought into that."

"I think it would be good for you to start one. Most drivers pick something that is dear to them and money raised is donated to a specific charity. For instance Kasey Kahne's foundation covers multiple causes like Victory Junction, Red Cross, Ronald McDonald House and the Make a Wish foundation. Do you have any ideas or thoughts on what kind of foundation you would want?"

Did I have ideas? Maybe? There was a time in my life when music was the only thing that consumed me. No one knew that I had once studied music. Not even my parents. It was a secret I held dear to my heart. Life changed and I no longer had that dream but instead a bigger dream of being a racecar driver. Instead of opening up about my own life maybe I could help kids hear the music within them—bring music to deaf kids.

"Edward?"

"I'm sorry I was thinking. Actually, I think I have an idea."

For the next few minutes I explained what I had in mind for a charity and what I wanted to accomplish. Bella listened never asking personal questions but taking lots of notes. I really felt good about this cause.

"I love the idea, Edward. What made you think of this?"

"It was nothing really."

"It sounded a lot more than nothing."

"Can we just drop it?" I snapped.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you. I'll contact the appropriate people and get the ball rolling. With NASCAR Day in May we'll be able to promote this and raise money at the same time. We'll talk more about that closer to the event."

"No problem."

"Edward … I know I was pushed upon you, but we need to find a middle ground. I'm here to promote your career. I can't do that without your help and cooperation. If there is something I need to know, I'm counting on you to tell me what it is, okay?"

I nodded.

"Check please."

I couldn't wait to get out of that damn restaurant. I'd been good and only had one beer – anymore and all my inhibitions would have come crashing down around me. What was it about this beautiful woman in front of me that made me so weak?

"Am I that revolting?" Bella asked softly.

"No, Bella … it's not that. I just … I have things to do. I'm sorry, we'll talk soon, okay?"

I paid the tab and excused myself from the table without another word. I felt a little bad about leaving her sitting there with a confused look on her beautiful face but, I needed some space.

**BPOV**

What the hell was that all about?

One minute we were having a civilized conversation about charities and the next thing I know Edward's shifted back in to his cold, assholish persona. His hot and cold tendencies were starting to piss me off. I wasn't sure how to walk the line with him. I never knew what would set him off.

Sure, it hadn't been a good idea to suggest Viagra and Tampax as sponsors, but they were willing to spend their money and take their chances on Edward. Dr. Pepper was on par with the other companies offers but sometimes soft drinks could be a hard sell because if the racing team was already affiliated with another soft drink it was a no go. Thankfully, Carlisle had stayed away from Pepsi and Coca-Cola as sponsors.

I made a few more notes and finished my margarita before getting up to leave. I couldn't allow Edward's brashness to affect me. At the end of the day, I still had a job to do.

The next morning, I was up and at it early. I called Melanie, the PR person I was assigned to work with at Dr. Pepper and we had a teleconference about their expectations from Edward and I told them what Edward and Cullen Motorsports expected from them. Melanie promised to have their legal team fax a contract over to me as well as Cullen Motorsports' legal team by the end of the day. We roughed out a schedule for the commercial shoot the following week that fit with Edward's practice schedule. When I finished up with Melanie, I called Esme and scheduled another meeting with Carlisle and Edward for the following morning.

"They'll only have about forty-five minutes Bella. It's the only time I have to offer you. They're out testing again tomorrow and the techs from Hendrick will be here to see about those engines we've been having problems with."

I promised her it wouldn't be a problem, and I explained my conversation with Melanie. Esme was very pleased at the progress that I'd been able to make thus far. It was definitely a start.

The next morning, I walked into Cullen Motorsports with my messenger bag slung across my shoulder ready to do battle with Edward and Carlisle. I knew Carlisle wasn't the one I had to worry about; it was all Edward.

"Good morning, Carlisle." I smiled.

"Good morning, Bella."

"Did you get a chance to look over that contract I faxed you last night?" I asked as we walked down the hall toward the conference room.

"Yes, I did. Everything looks to be in order. My lawyer will be here briefly this morning to look it over again, but I'm sure if Dr. Pepper's legal team drew them up they are all in order."

I nodded.

"It's still best to have your lawyer look them over, and I hope that Edward has or will have a chance to look at them as well just to make sure that I didn't miss anything."

"I'm quite confident that you've been diligent where Edward is concerned, Bella. I feel we owe you a great deal of thanks for continuing to try where Edward is concerned. I know he can be a handful."

"Carlisle, with all due respect, Edward is far more than a handful."

I heard two collective gasps as we entered the room.

Shit.

"Good morning, Bella," Esme greeted me with a timid smile.

Edward just looked at me and grunted.

"Esme … let's give Edward and Bella a moment shall we?" Carlisle asked.

Esme nodded and they stepped out in to the hallway, closing the door behind them.

I sat down next to Edward and set my messenger bag in front of me.

"Edward, I'm sorry. I know it's only been a couple of days but honestly I feel like I have to walk on eggshells around you. I never know how you're going to react. One minute you're open and warm and the next you're cold and closed off. The other night you left the restaurant like your ass was on fire."

Edward exhaled sharply.

"Bella … I don't know what to tell you. That's how I am. I'm an asshole who is focused on my job. I appreciate that you've taken everything I've dished out to you. You've been nothing but honest with me and that honesty is helping to keep my sorry ass in check. The next couple of weeks are going to be crazy with the schedule that you've set up for me, but maybe we can find some time and I can make dinner up to you?"

I bit my lip thinking over his offer. I figured that it was an offer of apology and probably the best one I'd get from him.

"Sure, Edward. I'd like that."

**EPOV**

It had been a long time since I actually enjoyed talking with a woman. Most women only talked to me to get in my pants. Usually that wasn't a problem but, it was nice to talk and listen to a normal conversation, instead of hearing_ your place or mine_. Not that I would let Bella know any of this.

I was still trying to figure out the whole Bella thing. It scared the shit out of me the feelings that were stirring in me and I didn't know what to do about it. She made me feel things I thought I would never feel again, especially not after the whole Kate debacle.

I wanted to know more about her. I needed to know her. I had to find out what it was about her that had me coming unraveled. The only way to do that was to put in a little bit of effort.

"Tell me something about yourself," I urged.

Bella looked at me surprised.

"Like what?"

"Like what brought you here - to North Carolina. What motivated you to take up the profession you did?"

"My Gran lived just outside of Charlotte, and I loved coming here to visit her when I was out of school for the summer. As for my job - it was kind of something I fell into. A friend of my Gran's owns the company I work for - she and her husband took me in as an intern. I worked for them while earning my degree at UNC Chapel Hill."

"That explains why you came so highly recommended." I grinned.

"I don't actually work with them, I just work for them. I can promise you that my recommendation didn't come from them although I'm sure they'd be happy to give one."

Edward chuckled and I continued.

"What about you? Racing can't be the only thing you're passionate about. There's more behind that tough facade you put up."

"There's not much to tell, Bella."

Even as the words slipped from my lips, I couldn't stop them. I knew I needed to put some effort in but I just wasn't ready to delve into everything. So I kept those secrets to myself.

"Come on, Edward give me something. It's the least you can do."

"Really, there isn't much time left for anything else besides racing."

"I can feel you holding back on me, but I'll let it go for now."

I was shocked at how well this woman saw right through me. It unnerved me how she could get under my skin and know me so well.

We talked a while longer before we decided to call it a night. After I settled the bill, I walked Bella out to her car. When we stopped at her car the air around us seemed to become thick with sexual attraction. I just stood there not sure what to do. Do I shake her hand?

"I had a really nice time, Edward. Thank you."

"It was my pleasure. It was the least I could do for being a jerk."

"You know, you're not half bad when you want to be."

"Hey, don't go spreading that around. I don't want people thinking I'm actually a nice guy."

Bella laughed and boy did she have a beautiful laugh—among other things. Like her beautiful eyes that stared back at me as her tongue peeked out to lick her lips. Those same lips that were moist from her tongue, inviting me to taste.

Not thinking, I lowered my lips to hers and captured hers in mine. Bella became still but soon her lips were moving against mine. She reached up wrapping her arms around my neck as I pulled her close deepening the kiss. My tongue slipped past her lips to twirl with hers as I learned every inch of her mouth.

The kiss seemed to go on forever, but I didn't mind. Then a soft moan escaped Bella's lips bringing me out of my Bella induced fog. I pulled back noticing her lips were wet and swollen from our kiss and those beautiful brown eyes looked confused.

"I'm sorry, Bella. I shouldn't have done that."

"What?"

"I have to go," I said as I turned on my heel and left her standing there by her car. I knew it was the coward's way but I didn't know how to deal with all those emotions swimming in my head.

**BPOV**

What was his deal? I wanted to know why he'd open up a little and let go but then it was like he realized what was happening and he locked himself up tighter than a drum. Frankly, his mood swings were giving me whiplash.

Thankfully, the next few weeks I was so busy that I didn't have time to think about Edward's moods. The only reason I had to think about Edward at all was because I was busting my ass to make sure that everything was set for the upcoming Daytona 500.

After the sponsor was locked in, my next order of business was sitting down with Esme and ordering merchandise that would not only be sold at the Cullen Motorsports gift shop, but at the Racetrack Midway and . I enjoyed working with Esme. She was soft spoken, intelligent and definitely one of the sweetest people I'd ever had the pleasure of meeting. She was a good business woman – overseeing the business side of Cullen Motorsports and at the heart of it all she was a mom – the matriarch of the Cullen racing empire. She loved her boys and her husband fiercely – she cheered for them and supported them unconditionally.

"Esme, I think you are an incredible woman. I don't know how you manage to do everything."

"It's not as easy as it looks, Bella. Carlisle and I have had our hardships over the years and we've struggled. Lord, how we struggled. What we've built here was constructed with blood, sweat, and tears. Carlisle raced for my daddy, and our whole relationship blossomed around a racetrack. My boys grew up and this is the only life they've ever known. Yes, I've made sacrifices in my life but I don't regret any of them. The only thing I didn't sacrifice was my family. I'd like to think my boys are well rounded. Edward played the piano – still does every once in a while and Emmett played the trumpet. But what we have here – in this building – we made it together. We brought you in hoping you could help us make it better."

Once Esme mentioned Edward played the piano, I didn't hear much else. That explains why he was so excited about using his foundation to bring Music and the Deaf to the US. He wanted to create a charity to help deaf children experience music. Edward was so passionate about it when he described what he wanted. It all made sense now.

"Bella?"

"Oh gosh, Esme. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to zone out on you. I was just thinking about what you said. I still can't imagine everything you've done to get where you are today. Where your family is. I think it's wonderful."

"Yes, well like I said, it hasn't been an easy road. That's part of why Edward is the way he is. I promise Bella, he's got a heart of gold in there somewhere. So if he gives you grief try to remember that."

"I will, Esme."

"Good. Now, you are coming with us to Daytona aren't you?"

"I wasn't planning on it. Do you need me there?"

"Bella, it's 'The Great American Race'. One of the biggest races of the season. We'd love for you to come down with us. We make it a big family thing. Jasper is bringing that sweet little girlfriend of his and I'm sure since you two are such good friends she'll enjoy your company if nothing else. Emmett and Rosalie will be there of course, so you'll get to meet them and it will be fun."

"Are you sure? I don't know if I'd be able to get a hotel room on such short notice."

"I'm positive, Bella. Don't worry about a hotel room, we've got it all taken care of. We actually own a beach house down there, so you can stay in one of our guest rooms. It's better than a hotel any day."

"Thanks, Esme. I still have a ton of stuff to do, but if you think of anything else let me know."

After my meeting with Esme, I still had to confirm the meet and greet that Edward was scheduled to do and make sure that all the photos he was going to sign were ready to hand over to Melanie who was handling the event with Dr. Pepper.

A week before we were supposed to leave for Daytona, Esme emailed me all the details. I'd meet the Cullens at Concord Regional Airport and fly to Daytona on their private jet. It would be the first time I'd see Edward again since the night he kissed me and ran. As much as it hurt that he turned and ran – I didn't want things to be awkward.

Carlisle greeted me warmly when I arrived at the airport, he took my suitcase from me, and pointed me to the plane. I was quickly introduced to Emmett and his wife, Rosalie. Jasper and Alice arrived and took their seats. I looked around but didn't see Edward anywhere.

"Don't worry, Bella. My little bro will be here eventually and we can be on our way." Emmett chuckled.

I pulled out my e-reader and settled into my seat. I got lost in my own little bubble and barely heard the raised voices in front of me.

It appeared that Carlisle was reprimanding Edward for being late and Edward wasn't having it. He plopped down in the seat next to me and blew out a sharp breath.

"You okay?" I asked softly.

"I'm fine," Edward grumbled.

"Look, Edward, I don't know what happened – if it was something I did that upset you or what. We will probably be seeing a lot of each other in the next couple weeks. I don't want this tension or whatever it is that is going on between us to have an effect on what we're going to Daytona to do."

Edward gasped and looked at me – his emerald eyes were piercing.

"You think I'm upset with you? That you did something to make me feel that way?" Edward asked.

I couldn't meet his eyes – I could feel the tears welling up in my own, and I nodded quickly before turning toward the window.

"Bella … hey, look at me," Edward urged, his voice soft and velvety. "Please don't cry."

I felt his hand on my arm; warmth enveloped me and caught me completely by surprise.

"Edward … please don't." I sniffled.

"Bella … I'm sorry. I told you, I'm an insufferable asshole but it was never my intention to make you feel like any of this was your fault."

I turned to him fully aware my eyes were filled with tears. "Oh, Bella …"

"Why, Edward? Why after the best kiss of my life did you run away like a coward?"

Edward muttered a curse under his breath as he stared at me with wide eyes. Those same eyes that had looked straight to my soul once before, making me feel things for this man.

After a moment he turned more in his seat as he took my face in his hands, stroking his thumbs against my cheeks.

"I never meant to hurt you. You make me feel so many things. I was so scared of what they all meant, so yeah, I took the coward's way and ran. I'm so sorry."

"Edward …"

He lowered his head taking my lips in his as I turned to deepen the kiss. Edward's warm, soft lips felt incredible against my own. Our lips moved in a slow passionate kiss as I moved closer to him, wrapping my arms around his neck. Edward dropped his hands from my face to my hips, gently caressing them in small circles.

The feel of his hands on my body as his tongue traced my lower lip sent my heart racing and tingles to other parts, but then he slowly pulled back to rest his forehead to mine.

"Bella, you drive me so damn crazy."

"The feeling's mutual."

A sweet smile slowly spread across his face, and he gently pressed a kiss to my forehead. We settled back in our seats and Edward raised the armrest between us allowing him to sit closer to me. I sighed and laid my head on his shoulder. He put in his ear buds and was quiet for the remainder of the flight but every now and then he'd kiss my head or squeeze my hand. After his apology, he was in constant contact with me – as if I'd run away.

I knew this was hard for Edward – I could see the struggle in his eyes. My touch seemed to calm him – to put him at ease. If it helped him, I wasn't about to take it away from him.

The weather in Daytona was beautiful when we landed. Esme said we'd have a day to rest and settle in before getting to work the next day when the haulers arrived. Esme, Rosalie, Alice and I headed to the store for groceries while the guys took our bags and went to the house.

I walked with Esme while Rose and Alice walked ahead of us.

"We'll have to get a few things to stock the motorhome," Esme said softly.

"Motorhome?" I asked.

"Mmmhmm. Each driver has a motorhome that is parked in the infield. That's where they stay if they choose not to stay in a hotel and it's where they rest before a race. Edward will probably spend more time there than at the house. He won't need a lot – just a few snacks, Gatorade and some bottled water."

"That can't be healthy."

Esme laughed.

"Bella … I usually take pre-made meals to him every day. Edward doesn't cook – at all."

We finished up our shopping and Esme drove us to the house. The beach house was beautiful. We pulled into the driveway and Carlisle, Emmett, and Jasper met us to carry in our purchases. Edward met me at the door taking the bags I was carrying from me. I followed him into the kitchen where he sat the bags on the counter.

"Come on, I'll show you around. I've already put your bags in your room."

Once Edward had shown me around downstairs, I followed him to the second floor where he led me to my room and showed me the guest bathroom I'd share with Jasper and Alice.

"Edward … thank you," I said softly.

"For what?"

"Being honest; bringing my bags up; showing me around."

He reached out for my hand and pulled me toward him gently pressing his lips to my temple.

"I care about you, Bella. I really like you and it's overwhelming to me. This isn't something I planned—especially during my rookie year."

"I get that, Edward. I wasn't expecting this … attraction. I'm between a rock and a hard place. I have a professional commitment to your parents, their company and ultimately – you. It's unethical but I'm having a tough time separating my feelings toward you. I never know which side of you I'm going to see – sweet Edward or asshole Edward."

"I'm going to try to be better for you, Bella. I can't promise you sunshine and roses all the time, but I will try. Don't worry about my parents. I talked to my mom and as long as you do what you're contracted for, they could care less about your personal life. They adore you. From the very first time they met you they thought you'd be perfect for me."

"What do you see happening between us, Edward?" I asked curiously.

"I'm not sure to be honest, Bella. I can't deny anymore that I'm drawn to you. Unfortunately – this … racing is my life. It's not easy. I'm gone a lot and as much as I'd like for you to be a part of it, I want more for you than that, but I'm selfish enough to want you anyway."

I nodded.

"What do you want, Bella?" he asked softly.

"I want to stop playing this hot and cold game. If you need space just say so; I won't be offended. I wasn't lying when I said what I did on the plane. That truly was the best kiss of my life and I can't help but think beyond that kiss. Will everything with you be as good as that kiss?"

"God, I hope so," Edward breathed as he leaned in to brush his lips against mine.

I pulled away needing some space of my own. I asked Edward if I could freshen up a bit and he kissed me on the cheek saying that he'd be with Jasper and Emmett. I changed from my capris and shirt into a sundress and headed out toward the beach.

**EPOV**

I really didn't feel like leaving her alone but I did with a heavy heart. After I grabbed a water from the fridge, I went in search of everyone. Mom and Dad were curled up on a lounge chair on the deck while Emmett and Jasper were down on the beach throwing a football back and forth as Alice and Rose watched.

After giving a nod to my parents I made my way down the short trail to where Emmett and Jasper were. The girls were deep in conversation while the guys came to halt when I approached.

"Where's Bella?" Jasper asked with concern in his voice.

"She needed a few minutes. She'll be down soon."

"You better not hurt her."

"Fuck You, Jazz."

"I'm serious, Ed. I like her. Damn, we all like her. And not just because of the great job she does."

"Edward, he's right. We all care about her," Emmett decided to pipe in.

"Jesus. Give me some credit here, guys. Did you ever think that maybe I care about her too? The last thing I want to do is hurt her."

"Ed, I'm just saying I know you have a lot on your mind with the upcoming race and all but if you're not serious about her, now's the time to let her go."

I knew my brother and Jazz meant well, and I actually respected them for sticking up for Bella, but sometimes I felt like they didn't give me enough credit. Not that recently I gave them any reason to, but that was going to change.

"Guys I really appreciate you caring enough to stick up for her. Not that it's any of your business, but I do care about her and I'm serious about making this work between us."

"Good … now that that's out of the way. How about some football?"

It felt really good to relax and spend some time with my family. The guys and I threw the ball around for a bit while the girls watched and chatted away. Bella soon joined them and it seemed like our little circle was completed.

When we grew tired and the girls were restless without their men, we joined them. I plopped down on the beach pulling Bella in between my legs and wrapped my arms around her. It felt right to have her warm body leaning against my chest and in my arms.

I kissed her head pulling her closer. "Are you okay?"

"I am now."

We sat like that for hours — talking and having normal conversations with our friends. When the sun began to set and the breeze from the ocean chilled our skin we made our way back to the house. Mom had cooked a big home cooked meal of fried chicken, mashed potatoes and corn on the cob that we all enjoyed immensely.

After dinner I wrapped my arm around Bella and we took a stroll along the beach. It was still cool for early February but not bitter cold where we needed multiple layers of clothing. Bella leaned her head on my shoulder while I had an arm wrapped around her as we enjoyed the relaxing sounds of the waves crashing. There wasn't an awkward silence but a comfortable feel of being there together.

"Esme said you have to go to the motorhome. When?"

"I wasn't planning on going till next Saturday for the shoot-out. Is that okay?"

"It's fine. I was just curious."

I came to a stop pulling Bella close looking into those chocolate pools that captivated me so.

"Baby, I want you to come with me. After the shoot-out I'm not sure how much alone time we'll have but I want you there with me."

"Okay."

"Tomorrow I have an autograph session for most of the day. You're coming to that right?"

"Of course. I have to make sure my newest client is on his best behavior." Bella smirked.

"Witch," I said as I smacked her ass lightly. "Well, Tuesday is Valentine's day and I thought we could spend the day together. Maybe go to the go kart track and then have a romantic dinner. Does that sound good?"

"Sounds like a plan."

The next morning we enjoyed breakfast with my parents before Bella and I left for Sports Authority. She was so cute when she made sure I had enough photos for signing and had plenty of Dr. Pepper to drink. I respected Bella and even though I was an asshole in the past I had turned a new leaf. So I made sure to be on my best behavior. For _her_.

Signing autographs and posing for pictures wasn't hard work, just tiresome. Knowing Bella was there helped. She stood out of the way, but I knew she was there. Her presence is what relaxed me and got me through the day.

On Valentine's Day we spent the day racing around the go kart track and playing mini golf before having dinner at The Cellar. Before calling it a night we sat on the deck enjoying a glass of wine as we watched the stars and talked about meaningless stuff. It had been the best Valentine's Day I ever spent with a woman.

Wednesday and Thursday I had more fan appearances and autograph sessions which Bella was right by my side through. At night we sat under the stars wrapped in each other's arms enjoying our time together. Soon our time would be limited and I would be in racer mode.

**BPOV**

All day Friday was spent in Edward's arms watching the waves crash against the shore or chatting with our friends, enjoying a drink on the deck. It was officially our last day at the beach house before we had to go to the motorhome and what we came here for would start.

Emmett, Rose, Alice and Jazz went off to the movies while Esme and Carlisle had gone to dinner. Edward and I had opted to stay behind and spend our last night alone sitting on the deck.

The past week had been a big surprise and an eye opener of sorts. While Edward was respectable and nice during his fan events, he was a sincere, caring gentleman when we were alone. The more time I spent with him the more I knew I was falling for him.

I wanted to know everything about Edward and that included his deepest secrets. After speaking with Esme the other day, I knew he was holding back. The basis of his foundation had something to do with music and his past but I wasn't sure what. I knew it meant a lot to him and if it was that important to him, I _needed_ to know.

"Edward?"

"Hmmm?"

"Why piano?"

"What?"

"Esme said you played piano when you were younger I was just curious."

"Oh. I just liked it I guess."

"Does that have anything to do with why you chose 'Feel the Music' as your foundation?"

"No." I felt Edward's body tighten up with tension behind me but I continued on.

"You were so passionate when you explained what you wanted for your foundation, I would love to hear the story behind it."

"There's nothing really to tell."

"Bringing music to the deaf isn't just something you think of on a whim."

"Well it was."

Edward got up not saying another word as he stared off into the distance. It felt like an ocean had grown between us, there was so much space. I wanted to go to him, apologize but when I whispered his name he snapped at me and I knew I had pushed him too far. That's when I left him alone.

I made my way up to my room and crawled into bed thinking about our conversation. The more I thought about it the more I realized that whatever it was that sparked Edward to be so passionate about bringing music to deaf kids was something that had hurt him deeply for it to have such an effect on him.

I drifted off to sleep with visions of Edward sitting at a piano playing with such passion – the power of the music emanating from him so similar to the fire that ran through his veins when he raced. I dreamt of his strong hands and long fingers – how they held a firm grasp on the wheel but were so gentle on the ivories.

Somewhere between consciousness and my dreams I heard a creek of a door, a rustle of feet and then my name whispered very softly. I didn't realize it wasn't a dream until it was louder startling me awake as I looked to my right and saw a shadow.

"Edward?"

"Shhh, baby. I didn't mean to scare you."

"What time is it?"

"It's a little after two o'clock."

"What are you doing here?"

"I couldn't sleep. I thought you would leave."

I sat up more in the bed leaning back against the headboard. "It hurt when you pushed me away but I wouldn't leave."

"I'm sorry I hurt you. I _never_ want to hurt you, Bella. I just don't know how to do this."

"Do what, Edward?"

"Talk. Open up. It's just so hard to put myself out there. It scares the shit out of me."

I couldn't keep having this conversation while he was kneeling in front of me. I patted the bed next to me. "Come sit with me."

After he situated himself against the headboard next to me, I took his hand rubbing circles along his knuckles. "I'm scared too, Edward. Everything has happened so fast. I've never felt what I feel for you for anyone else. I want to be there for you and learn everything there is to know about Edward Cullen, but if you won't open up to me how can what we have ever go anywhere?"

Drawing a deep breath, Edward started talking about college and why music was important to him.

"I knew I'd never race forever; I wanted to get an education so I went to college. I've always had a passion for music so it was a no-brainer that I would study it. If there ever came a time that I couldn't race I want to teach music."

"I think you'll be a great teacher."

"I hope so. Anyway … I had a friend in college who got pregnant. Around six months after she had the baby we noticed something was wrong. He didn't seem to respond to voices or sounds and later found out he was deaf. She couldn't deal with her son being deaf and basically left him with me. Since I wasn't the father I couldn't get him the help he needed. I ended up finding her parents and giving him to them."

"Edward, that's awful."

"I remembered all the times I talked to her belly or played the piano while she was pregnant and it made me sad to think he would never hear that. You asked why music for deaf kids, well that's why. I wanted to find a way to bring music to kids just like him."

He sounded so broken with his admission. It made sense why he was so passionate about his foundation. I leaned over and gently kissed his cheek. Edward wrapped his arms around me and pulled me to his chest.

"Thank you for telling me, Edward."

"I'm trying, Bella."

"I know you are, baby. Tell me what you need right now."

"I need you, Bella," he whispered.

"I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere."

He pressed his lips to mine in a searing kiss that took my breath away. I wrapped my arms around his neck as he pulled me close deepening the kiss. My body was on fire just from the touch of his lips to mine.

A slight pressure as our lips joined together then they were moving against each other slowly. I slipped my tongue out to slide along his bottom lip causing Edward to groan. His lips were warm and soft, when my lips parted and he finally slid his tongue in and touched mine my body tingled in all the right places. Just the tips touched then they tangled together as we fought for dominance.

Edward trailed wet kisses along my jaw, up my neck to the spot right below my ear. He nipped the earlobe before whispering, "I want you, Bella."

I couldn't help the soft moan that left my lips as he took my earlobe in his mouth and gently sucked. As I moved to straddle his legs and settled on his lap, Edward's fingers started roaming up my sides. His thumbs brushed against the sides of my breasts and I moaned again.

"Baby, if you keep moaning like that, I'm not sure I can be good anymore," Edward whispered.

"Maybe I don't want you to be good."

Before I knew it my shirt was up and over my head and Edward was caressing my naked breasts.

"You're so beautiful, Bella."

I arched my back as Edward lowered his head taking one nipple into his mouth swirling his tongue until it was hard and wet.

"Fuck, Edward. That feels so good."

I needed to see him. Touch him. I fumbled with his shirt before he pulled back to lift it over his head. My fingers lightly traced over the fine hair, his muscled chest and defined abs ad I learned every inch of him. I reached my hand down between us and stroked his erection through his thin lounge pants.

"Jesus, Bella."

In an instant Edward had me flipped on my back and was pulling my panties down my legs.

"Mmm you're so wet, baby."

I felt his warm breath over my skin before he took a languid lick of my pussy and I nearly jumped right off the mattress.

"Tastes like heaven."

Edward circled my clit with his tongue, licking and sucking. He pushed two fingers inside while his lips still moved along my wet folds. I tangled my fingers in his hair lightly scratching his scalp holding him right where I wanted him. When he curled his fingers hitting just the right spot while his mouth latched onto my clit, I came hard.

Barely breathing from the amazing orgasm, Edward moved to hover over me. He had already discarded his pants and sheathed himself with a condom when I felt the tip of his cock brush along my sensitive, wet folds.

"Edward … please, I need you inside me."

I gazed into his eyes noticing they were a darker green than his normal emerald shade and were hooded. There was lust in those beautiful orbs but something else. My heart leapt in my chest at the thought that he felt a fraction of what I felt for him.

Edward took my lips in his as he thrust forward and I gasped at the feeling of him filling me completely. He was larger than any other man I'd been with, and it took a minute to adjust to his size. The feeling of finally coming together was overwhelming.

"Baby, you feel so good."

I wrapped my legs around his waist digging my heels in his ass as he started to move while I met him thrust for thrust. Each move of his hips brought my clit in contact with his pelvis. My orgasm was close as his thrusts became shorter and harder.

"Edward …"

"God, I know, baby."

Edward fingered my clit as he drove faster and more urgently, bringing my orgasm right to the edge.

"Oh Edward … fuck … your cock feels soo good."

"Bella, I'm not gonna last."

"Edward, come. Let go for me."

"Ugh …"

With one more thrust of his hips, he was screaming my name and I was right behind him. I let myself feel and not think about anything but the pleasure I was experiencing and the man above me. It took a few minutes for us to catch our breath before Edward slowly pulled out and got up to discard the condom.

When he returned, he pulled the covers back to slip in bed behind me and pulled me toward him. He wrapped his arms around me protectively as I laid my head down, closing my eyes, and letting sleep consume me.

**EPOV**

"Hey Jazz, this thing feels tight through the center and a little loose going into the corners."

We were having one last morning practice before the duels tonight. Jazz and I were trying to fine tune my car in hopes of finishing well and gaining a good starting position for Sunday.

"All right, Eddie. Take her around once more and then bring her in. We'll take her up a half round and put in a little wedge and see if that helps."

"10-4"

It felt good to be back in the car and out on the track. It felt even better to know that Bella was sitting up on the pit box with Jazz watching the final practice. When I woke up that morning, I hated to leave her.

There weren't enough words to describe how it felt to make love to Bella. I'd been so lost in her, I didn't know where I ended and she began. I wanted it to be that way always. It was something I'd never experienced before. Not with Kate – not with any one.

I pulled up to my pit stall and my crew quickly made the adjustments Jasper called for and I was on my way again for a few more laps of practice.

My car felt pretty good after the last set of adjustments and I felt like it was where it needed to be for tonight's duels. I pulled the car into the garage. After talking with Jasper and a couple of our techs for a few minutes I looked over to see Bella looking as beautiful as ever – leaning against the bay door.

"Hey handsome," she smiled.

"Hey, beautiful. Want to go grab some lunch and then relax in the motorhome for a while?"

We grabbed lunch at the Cracker Barrel that was just outside of the racetrack. It was a nice little walk. We talked and enjoyed each other's company as we ate and I was even asked to sign a few autographs as we went. It was always fun to interact with the fans, but it was even better when I had Bella beside me.

We took a nap in the motorhome when we returned from lunch – the movie we started to watch long forgotten. We were woken up by the sound of my mom knocking on the door. She had brought dinner over to me even though she knew full well I could eat with the crew in the hospitality tent. She stayed for a few minutes giving me some encouraging words before going over to the hauler to see Dad and Em.

"You'll be with my mom, right?" I asked.

"Mmmhmm. Up in the skybox." Bella smiled.

"If I win will you come to Victory Lane?"

"If you want me there, I'll be there."

"I definitely want you there."

She sat with me while I ate my dinner and gave me a relaxing shoulder massage when I was done. I suited up and we left the motorhome, headed for the hauler. My mom was waiting for Bella to join her, Rosalie and Alice so they could go up to the skybox and watch the races. I hated that Bella couldn't stay and watch the race from on top of the pit box. That was something for me to look forward to … someday.

I gave Bella a sweet kiss on the lips before sending her off with my mom.

"Bye, beautiful. Have a good time with my mom and the girls."

"Bye, babe. Have a good race and be safe."

"I will," I said with a wink.

As I walked toward pit road, I could feel the adrenaline pumping through my veins. I could hear the crowd cheering in the stands at whatever the announcers were saying. I'd be racing in the first of two duels. One hundred and fifty miles would determine where I'd start in the Great American Race. It was my first Daytona 500 and like any NASCAR driver it was my lifelong dream to win it and a great privilege to be here. I wanted to do well for my father, our team, and the Cullen Racing legacy. I wanted to be someone my fans could be proud of and even more – someone Bella could be proud of.

I stood next to my team as the invocation was given and I listened to the prayer with rapt attention and prayed to the powers that be to keep us all safe and to have a good race.

As I flipped the ignition switch and fired up the engine I could feel the rumble of thunder beneath me. I closed my eyes for a moment – shutting off everything in my head except what I needed to race.

"All right, Eddie - one hundred and fifty miles; sixty laps, bud. We're going ten laps before our first caution then twenty-five more and we'll take a ten minute break. Pit road speed is fifty-five in second gear."

"10-4. Let's have a good race, guys."

"Pace car is headed for pit road," Called my spotter. "Green flag."

I put the hammer down and quickly fell into a line of cars on the high side of the track. Because Daytona is a restrictor plate track drafting is required. I watched as a few cars fell back because they got stuck in the middle.

We raced for about ten laps before I heard Jazz on the radio.

"How are your temps Eddie?"

"One forty. One fifty. Looks pretty good. We may want to take a little of that wedge out that we put in earlier – it's just a little tight."

"10-4. Caution is out starting on this lap, so bring her in and we'll take that wedge out."

"Ed – you're four, three, two – wheels straight, foot on the brake."

I slid into my pit stall and my over the wall crew went to work. After four fresh tires, a splash of gas and a little bit of wedge out, I was on my way again. I wasn't that far behind the leader and I was anxious to see where I was coming off of pit road. My crew did an awesome job getting me in and out.

"Awesome stop guys. Thanks for getting it done," I praised.

That's something they'd probably never heard from me before. Dad always grumbled at me that I needed to give feedback to Jazz and the crew and try not to be such an asshole about it. Bella was teaching me little by little that I could be a private person without being a total prick.

I ended up fourth behind the leader and as long as I stayed in the pack, I was in a good position. The weather had cooled down and so had the track. It was all about finding the line with the best grip. Racing was good until about twelve laps in when Kyle Busch decided to get cute and attempt to pass Kevin Harvick, but instead he drifted up into the middle and his car got loose and took out the car behind me and an entire string of others.

"Caution's out, caution's out."

"How's it feel, Eddie?" Jasper asked.

"It feels pretty good. Maybe a little loose going into the corners but not bad."

"10-4. If you think we're good, we'll stay out. You've got plenty of gas and wear on those tires."

"10-4."

Seven cars were caught up in the wreck – taking four of them out of the race. That left twenty one cars in the field. It gave you a false sense of having better odds since there was still a second duel to be run.

When the green flag waved again I did my best to stay at the front of the pack. I had Denny Hamlin in front of me and Jimmie Johnson behind me. I was in good company. I knew both of them and got along pretty well with them for the most part. Jimmie and I had a bit of a kinship – he ran in a Hendrick car and I had a car with a Hendrick engine. We were running the high line of the track when Denny jumped out to try and take the lead and I followed him. Thankfully, Jimmie followed me and we were able to push past the leader before the next caution was called.

"Caution's out, caution's out."

"All right, bring her in, Eddie. No adjustments, just tires and gas."

"You're five, four, three, two – wheel straight, foot on the brake."

Jazz brought me some water and we talked briefly about some strategy for the rest of the race.

"You're doing good, bud. Just do what you're doing and I think we'll have a good finish."

I rolled off of pit road and back into line. I felt confident and Jasper re-affirming what I assumed made me feel a lot better.

"Pace car lights are out he's headed to pit road – green flag."

Three laps in, Denny slowed down and I went high around him with Jimmie hot on my tail.

"At your door – clear."

I couldn't describe how it felt to have the entire field of cars behind me but I knew it wasn't time to celebrate just yet. I could do that later with my entire team and Bella in my arms.

"Final lap, Eddie. Just keep on keepin' on. You've done an awesome job so far."

I was just coming out of turn four and I could see the finish line – it was right there within my reach.

"Wreck behind you but you're good as long as they don't throw a caution," Jasper warned.

I could see the flagman – the checkered flag in his hand and he was getting ready to wave it as his helper handed him the yellow.

"You're good, you're good! They're waving the checkers!"

"Woohoo! Thanks guys!" I hollered into my radio.

"Great job, bud! Just be careful when you come back around they're still wrecking behind ya."

I didn't care. I'd won at least a third place start in the Daytona 500. I was ready to kick it into high gear with the big boys, and I'd do it with my girl cheering me on.

* * *

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	2. Chapter 2

All things Twilight belong to Stephenie Meyer; we just like to play with her characters.

No copyright infringement is intended.

Thanks to our lovely beta darcysmom for all her hard work and fixing our mistakes. =)

* * *

In High Gear

* * *

Chapter Two

Once they cleaned up the wreck behind me, they allowed me to do my Polish Victory lap. I could hear my team cheering me over my radio and the somber voice of my Dad telling me that I'd made him proud.

The only thing I wanted more in that moment was to hear the sweet voice of my Bella who was up in the skybox watching. Sure, she'd eventually make her way to the infield but I wanted her there like yesterday.

I climbed out of my car and was showered with Gatorade and confetti as my entire team congratulated me on our win. I couldn't have done it without all of them. Jasper stood silently in the back, waiting for everyone else to get their sentiments out of the way. He approached me with a crooked smile and hugged the shit out of me telling me how proud he was.

"Tonight was huge, Edward. In the grand scheme of things, it may not seem that way but it is. You did everything right out there. You communicated with the team, you gave me the feedback I needed and it was the tools we needed for the win. If you do this in the Daytona 500, I think we have a fighting chance."

"Thanks, Jazz. I couldn't have done it without you. I appreciate your patience in hanging in there and believing in me."

Jazz laughed.

"You know, Eddie … I think I owe Bella big time. The changes she's made in you … nothing short of a miracle. I know you've got a long way to go yet but man, I'll take it."

"Speaking of Bella … where the hell are they? I thought they'd be down to the infield by now."

"Ali texted me a little bit ago and said they were on their way. Bella may have had to speak to the sponsors or something … who knows."

Krista Voda came over to interview me asking how I felt during the race and how I thought my team did. I felt a sense of pride as I spoke to her about them, and I hope I did an okay job. Talking to the media was not one of my favorite things.

Once I'd gone through a string of interviews and talked to a few of the other drivers, I turned to head back to our hauler. Bella was leaning against the back of my car with a sweet smile on her beautiful face.

"Hey, handsome."

"Hey, beautiful. God, are you a sight for sore eyes," I murmured as I approached her, my hands finding her hips and pulling her to me.

"You were awesome tonight, Edward. Your sponsors are incredibly happy right now."

"You talked to them?" I asked.

"Yep … Melanie called me as soon as the race ended. She's ecstatic and when Daytona is over she wants to talk about another commercial and some promo stuff regarding NASCAR Day. Apparently the fans love you."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah. If you could stay the sweet, charming man I know you are instead of switching back to the cold, cocky asshole you can be sometimes – you could give Dale Jr. a run for his money in the race for favorite driver."

I groaned … it was easier to be the cold, cocky asshole. Yeah, it made people dislike me but it was easier for me to hide behind the wall. So far Bella was the only person who'd been able to penetrate it and I still hadn't been able to open up to her fully. But every time I saw her standing there with a gorgeous smile on her face, I fell for her a little more. She had more faith in me than I had in myself.

"Maybe I only want to be your favorite driver." I smirked.

"You already are," Bella said sweetly, raising up on her toes and kissing me softly.

We broke apart and walked to the hauler hand-in-hand. While I wanted to really pull her into my arms and kiss the living shit out of her, I was sweaty and gross and probably smelled like burned rubber and oil.

"How about I get a shower and then we grab some dinner then hit a bar and celebrate?"

"Do you think that's such a great idea?"

"What? Are you afraid to be seen with me?"

"Edward … that's not what I meant and you know it."

"I know and I'm sorry. It's just … the Daytona 500 is in a few days. I just want to go out and celebrate with my girlfriend."

"Girlfriend? Is that what I am, Edward?"

"Of course. Why wouldn't you be?"

"It's not like we ever talked about it and I didn't want to assume."

In that moment I didn't care if I was sweaty and smelled to the high heavens, I needed to make sure this woman knew she was mine, and I only wanted her. I wrapped my arms around her pulling her close as I close crashed my lips to hers. Her arms immediately wrapped around my neck and she inched closer, if that was even possible. My hands moved of their own accord to the soft curves of her ass and squeezed as our mouths moved together in perfect sync.

When Bella's tongue touched my lower lip I moaned with appreciation and didn't hesitate to accept it. Our tongues twisted and turned and we took and gave from each other. I groaned when she took my tongue and sucked. I could feel her taut nipples through her shirt, which did nothing to settle my libido. My cock swelled and grew hard in my pants with all those sensations and if Bella felt it or was embarrassed, she never let on.

We continued to explore and fondle until I knew if we didn't stop I'd take her right here against my hauler for everyone to see. I pulled back to rest my forehead to hers trying to catch my breath.

"You drive me crazy, woman. Do you feel what you do to me?"

Bella nodded.

"I only want you, Bella, no one else. You're mine. So yes, that means you're my girlfriend. Okay?"

"Okay."

"Good. Now before I do indecent things to you against my hauler I better go get a shower."

Bella giggled and tried to straighten her clothes. "I guess I'll freshen up too."

I left Bella in the bedroom as I went in search of a warm shower to wash away the sweat and grime from the race. It would have been nice to shower with Bella but I knew if that happened we'd never leave the motorhome. I was really looking forward to taking Bella out and showing my her off.

After I was thoroughly clean, I went about dressing in jeans and a blue button down shirt. I fixed my hair the best I could and went to find Bella. She was sitting at the table in the kitchen area and was just closing her cell phone when she looked up and smiled.

"Hey."

"Hey, that was Alice. She and Jasper are going for some drinks and wanted to know if we were interested. I told her I wasn't sure what we were doing yet and would text her when I knew."

"As long as it's my bed you're in tonight I think I can share you for a little bit."

"Oh really, Mr. Masen? Is that so?"

"Um hmm."

"And why is it you think I would want to be in anybody's bed but yours?" Bella asked playfully.

"I never thought that."

"But you did insinuate that did you not?"

"No."

How did I not realize that Bella had been inching closer and closer until she was nose to nose with me?

"It will give me great pleasure to show you later just how much I want to be in _your_ bed." Bella moved in even closer before whispering, "But make no mistake, when I'm done you will know exactly who I want to be with."

"Jesus, Bella. Let's go before I change my mind and we stay in all night."

Bella chuckled then grabbed her purse and headed for the door. I watched her ass as her hips swayed and she walked down the steps. What was I thinking? It was going to be a long night.

Jasper and Alice were already sitting at the bar when Bella and I arrived.

"Hey, man!" Jazz greeted me happily as he kissed Bella on the cheek.

"Hey. I see you started without us."

Alice giggled and whispered something to Bella and I pulled out our chairs.

"Rose and Emmett should be here any minute!" Alice chirped.

I looked over at Bella and she was smiling brightly back at me. I gently took her hand in mine and squeezed it.

"I'll go get us some drinks. What would you like?" I asked her.

Bella wrapped her hand around my neck and pulled me down until her mouth was at my ear.

"I'd like a long, slow comfortable screw up against the wall."

_Jesus._

"Is that … is that a drink or a request?"

"Both …" Bella breathed.

I reached down to discretely adjust my pants when I saw Emmett and Rose walk in.

"You got a problem there, brother?" Emmett asked with a grin.

"Nothin' I can't take care of." I grinned back.

He plopped down in my empty seat while I made my way to the bar.

When I returned from the bar, Emmett was sitting with his arm around Bella.

"So … Bella is my asshole of a brother being good to you?"

I set mine and Bella's drinks down on the table before sliding Rose's over to her and finally setting Emmett's beer in front of him as I glared at him.

"Jesus, Em …" I said shaking my head.

"So far, he's been wonderful," Bella said with a smile.

"Good, if he steps out of line – you just let me know, okay?"

Bella nodded and Emmett stood to give me my chair back, nudging my shoulder as he did so.

The bar had a live band that night and they were actually decent. We sat and drank and listened for a long time. Bella sat close to me with my arm around her and her hand resting on my thigh.

"Want to dance?" Bella asked as she nuzzled my neck.

"Mmm … do I get to show you off?"

"Only if you take me home afterward and fulfill your promise." She smiled against my skin.

"Absolutely."

I spent the next few days trying to focus on the big race on Sunday. We practiced on the track and tried our best to get the car adjusted just right. I won't say that winning wasn't important but our goal for that weekend was to finish in the top ten. I spent my nights with Bella curled up together in my motorhome. I'd learned that her fingers were magic and she would gladly massage away all the tension I had building up in my back.

The day before the race, I had to make a couple of appearances, one for Dr. Pepper and the other for NASCAR as the winner of one of the duels. Bella dutifully went with me and stood to the side making sure that I had everything I needed.

"Doin' okay?" Bella asked softly about mid-way through my first appearance.

"Yeah, I'm okay."

I waited while the next group of people was ushered in and I talked to Bella softly for a few minutes while they did so. I noticed that someone was standing in front of me eagerly waiting for my attention to focus on them and that's when my day went from being really good to being really bad.

I took in every inch of the beautiful blonde woman in front of me and I felt like I was looking at a ghost.

"Kate ..." I breathed.

* * *

A/N: Thanks for reading. Please leave us some love! =D FYI - This story will be posting every other Thursday =)


	3. Chapter 3

All things Twilight belong to Stephenie Meyer; we just like to play with her characters.

No copyright infringement is intended.

Thanks to darcysmom and Edwardsmyobsession1971 for beta'ing and pre-reading. These wonderful ladies make our writing better.

* * *

**In High Gear**

Chapter Three

* * *

"Hello, Edward. It's good to see you."

"I'd say the same but then I'd be lying."

"You've changed, Edward."

I ignored her comment. "What do you want, Kate? If you didn't notice, I'm a little busy here and don't have time for your games."

"I thought maybe we could get together and talk."

"What makes you think I have anything to say to you?"

"Maybe you don't have anything to say, but I do."

"You had your chance years ago but you chose to run instead of talk. That part of my life is in the past. I have no need to bring up old memories. It changes nothing."

"I never meant to hurt you, Edward. I was young and stupid and didn't know what to do."

"I guess me finding out Lucas wasn't mine wasn't part of your plan was it?"

Kate gasped staring at me shocked.

"Is everything okay here?" Bella asked concerned placing her hand on my shoulder.

"Everything's fine. She was just leaving."

I glared at Kate daring her to argue with me, but she nodded and walked away. I plastered a fake smile on my face and went back to signing autographs for fans.

Two hours later Bella was escorting me to my next appearance. I had a bad attitude and I knew I was taking it out on Bella, but I couldn't help myself. She'd ask a simple question and I would snap and give her a clipped answer. She took it in stride and blew it off, but I knew she was hiding her emotions well.

The tension between us was thick and awkward, and I knew eventually I would have to talk to Bella about what happened earlier with Kate. She deserved to hear the entire story about that relationship, but I wasn't sure I was ready to open that wound yet.

For another three hours I sat signing autographs and posing for pictures with fans with a forced smile on my face. By the time we got back to the motor home that night, I was exhausted. Bella and I barely said two words to each other. She never mentioned the earlier incident with Kate and neither did I. I needed my head clear for the race the next day and talking about my past was not on the agenda. I grabbed a shower and crashed as soon as my head hit the pillow not even waiting for Bella to join me in bed.

When I woke the next morning, I noticed the bed beside me was cold and looked like it hadn't been slept in. The night before I had been so exhausted I never noticed Bella had never come to bed. I knew I needed to find her and talk to her, but it was race day and I needed to focus. This race was one of the most important races of the season and I couldn't let my emotions get in the way.

Bella was sitting at the table eating breakfast when I walked out of the bedroom. She was reading quietly on her Nook and she looked like she was exhausted.

"Hey."

"Hey," Bella said, not looking up from whatever she was reading.

"Baby, I'm sorry about yesterday and I know we need to talk but I need to focus on the race today," I apologized weakly.

Bella looked up at me and nodded once, acknowledging that she understood.

"Do you want some breakfast?"

"That would be great," I replied.

"Anything in particular?"

"Umm … eggs and maybe some toast?"

Bella made me some breakfast and set a cup of coffee in front of me as she disappeared into the bedroom to shower and get ready for the day. I was just getting ready to head out for our team meeting and then the drivers meeting when she stepped out of the bedroom. She was pulling her suitcase behind her and had her messenger bag slung over her shoulder.

"I think it's best if I go back to the beach house with Carlisle and Esme until after the race," Bella said quietly.

"Bella … I want to talk to you, but I don't have time for this shit now," I huffed.

"This shit?" She asked incredulously. "This so-called shit is something you created, Edward. All I know is we were good until some leggy blonde showed up at the signing yesterday and you did a complete one-eighty. I didn't hear the conversation because I was doing my job and keeping your sponsors happy while you were having a little chat with Miss Thing. Obviously it wasn't a happy conversation because after that you were angry and frustrated and you took it all out on me. I stood there and took everything that you dished out because I didn't want to cause a scene in front of your sponsor and fans. But you know what, Edward? Last night you were distant and cold and you've yet to explain to me what went down yesterday. I'm sorry if your day yesterday was exhausting – it comes with the territory, but I will not be a constant doormat for you. So you get your shit together and you go out there and race today and fulfill your commitments to your team and your sponsors. Then take some time to think about what you want to say to me because you'll get one more chance to make this right. You have to let me in if you want me to stick around."

I was frozen in place as I watched Bella leave the motor home without a backward glance. I was stunned by Bella's admission and didn't know what to say. How the hell could I let her walk out? She was so much more to me than just a woman in my life. She was my everything.

I knew I had been an asshole but I never thought Bella would leave. It made me think I had been taking advantage of our situation and that Bella would take anything I dished out. It wasn't fair to her.

After the race I was going to have to go to her and apologize and bring her back to me. If there was one thing I knew, it was that I couldn't live without her.

My heart hurt but I needed to get my head in the game and get ready to race. I went back into the empty bedroom and got myself together. After getting dressed I headed to the hauler for our team meeting.

As soon as I saw Emmett and Jasper's expressions I knew they had already heard about Bella leaving. My brother stormed over to me shoving a finger at my chest.

"What the hell did you do, Edward?"

"It's none of your business, Emmett."

"That's where you're wrong little brother. Jasper and I made ourselves very clear the other day. We care about Bella and you, dumbass, upset her."

"It doesn't concern you. It's between Bella and me. I fucked up but I'm going to make it right."

"You better because if I have to see Bella in tears again because of you, you'll have to deal with me and my fist."

My heart sank knowing I had made Bella cry. _How the hell was I supposed to get my head in the race when my heart was crumbling?_

"Emmett, I promise I'm taking care of this after the race."

I managed to get through the rest of the team meeting unscathed. Although I received numerous glares and dirty looks from not only Emmett and Jasper but also my father. _Jesus I had royally fucked up._

As if my day couldn't get any worse, when I made my way to pit road the clouds decided to open up and a heavy rain fell. So we did the only thing we could do - wait and wait and wait. In all the years since I was a little boy and I had been watching NASCAR, never had the Daytona 500 race been postponed because of rain and moved to a Monday night. It would be the first time in NASCAR history the race would be held on a Monday night.

The postponement of the race meant a postponement of my conversation with Bella as well. But it wasn't for lack of trying. Once the officials had announced the postponement of the race, I tried calling Bella to see if we could talk.

"Edward, I think it would be best if we just waited. Obviously you need time to sort out your issues and I need space. You also need to focus on the race and not on me. If you can't do well in the race, you're not only failing me, you're failing your family and sponsors as well as yourself so it's in your best interest that you go into the race with your head on straight."

"Bella … do you have any idea how hard that's going to be? This is killing me that I can't talk to you. I hate that I made you cry and I hate even more that I was a total shit to you. You deserve more than that. So much more."

Her words made complete sense, I did need to have my head on straight, but in that moment I needed to resolve my issues with Bella so that could happen. I couldn't go into the race with this huge rift between us.

"In a way, it makes me feel better knowing that you are aware of that, Edward. But I also need you to know when things get tough you can't shut down on me or shut me out. If you want this relationship to work you have to be honest with me. How can I help you to understand that?"

Bella sighed and she sounded so tired.

"Fuck, baby. I'm so sorry. I know I need to be more forthcoming with you and I'm working on it. The last person I expected to see yesterday afternoon was Kate but there she was and it sent me into a tailspin, obviously. I warned you that I wouldn't be sunshine and roses all the time but when I screw up I will own up to my mistakes. If it's any consolation – Kate was the biggest mistake I've ever made in my life."

That was the first time that I'd ever mentioned Kate directly to Bella by name. Sure I'd given her a watered down version of what actually happened – a very watered down version, but it was getting to the point where I'd have to tell Bella everything.

"Edward … I have a feeling that whatever happened with Kate isn't a story that I want to listen to tonight. Please don't take that the wrong way. I do want to hear it, but I have a feeling that it's going to take a lot out of both of us and I don't have that kind of energy to expend right now and neither do you. Get some rest and try to clear your head, okay? "

"I don't want to lose you, Bella," I whimpered.

The tone of indifference in her voice was killing me. I couldn't see her face to decipher whether she was pissed at me still or exhausted.

"I'm still here for now, Edward. I'll be here tomorrow too."

"Will you come to the motorhome in the morning?" I begged.

"Edward … I don't think that's a good idea. I wasn't kidding when I said I needed a little space."

My heart fell and I knew if Bella left it would surely shatter. I had to do everything in my power to keep her from walking away.

"I love you," I whispered.

Bella's gasp was audible.

"Don't say it unless you mean it, Edward," She chastised.

"I mean it with every fiber of my being, beautiful. Please … come have breakfast with me in the morning. I'll even cook … just … please?"

I decided that I wasn't above groveling and I was completely honest when I told her that I loved her. I only hoped that it would be enough.

* * *

**A/N: Thank you for all the lovely reviews. We have been trying to reply as best we can but we're sure you'd rather us work on updates than review replies right? Just because we don't reply doesn't mean that we don't love reading each and every one - your reviews mean so much! Leave us some love and we'll see you with another installment of Hockeyward on Tuesday! =D**


	4. Chapter 4

All things Twilight belong to Stephenie Meyer; we just like to play with her characters.

No copyright infringement is intended.

A big thank you to darcysmom for beta'ing and EdwardsmyObsession1971 for pre-reading. This wouldn't be as pretty without you ladies. YOU ROCK!

* * *

**In High Gear**

**Chapter Four**

* * *

**BPOV**

Would it be enough?

Would Edward professing his love for me be enough to make up for his actions the past couple days?

Honestly, I think it depended on what Edward had to tell me about the blonde that changed his demeanor so completely. I knew going in that it would be bad, and I was convinced that she was his friend from college who'd abandoned her son. What else could it have been?

"All right, Edward. I'll meet you for breakfast. I don't want you to try to explain anything until we have more time to sit down and talk though, okay?"

"Okay."

"Get some rest tonight and I'll see you in the morning."

"Thank you, Bella, and I meant it when I told you that I love you. I only hope you know how much."

I sighed, thinking that he had a funny way of showing it but not wanting to pick a fight with him.

"Goodnight, Edward."

I ended the call and got up from my chair out on the back deck of the Cullen's beach house.

"Is my son still being difficult?" Carlisle's soft voice came from the darkness.

I shook my head before I realized that he probably couldn't see my gesture.

"No. He's very apologetic, actually."

"Bella … my son wasn't always the way he is now. He's always been a bit … different – not in a bad way, but I'm not sure he's cut out for racing. He's got it in his blood and I think he's trying to be someone else. He actually quit racing for a few years and during that time he cut off all contact with us. He did things his own way. Hell, I'm not even sure what he did while he was gone because he sure as shit won't talk to Esme and me about it. I don't think he's talked to Emmett about it either and those two used to be as thick as thieves."

"He left with no explanation of where he was or what he was doing and you welcomed him back?"

"He's my son, Bella. I was so happy to have him back that none of that other stuff mattered. When he said that he wanted to go back to racing? I was beside myself. Just because he's made some choices that I may not agree with doesn't mean that I'm going to stop being his father."

"I apologize, Carlisle. That's not what I meant at all. I can't imagine turning my back on my child but I would have a hard time understanding his intentions and trusting him to do right by your family considering the fact that you own a racing team and so much is at stake."

"No offense taken, Bella." Carlisle sighed. "Edward is … Edward. We had a long talk when he came back and I can't help but think that he wants us to be proud of him. It's like he's trying to make up for being gone but to anyone outside of our family … he shuts down. Protects himself. You're the first person we've met since he's been back that he's attempted to get to know in any capacity. I honestly don't think he could have chosen a better person."

"It doesn't bother you that Edward and I are involved even though I'm working for you?"

Edward and I had talked about it already, and he said that his parents didn't care as long as I did the job that I had been hired to do, but it was still something I needed to hear from Carlisle and Esme.

"Bella … I think you are a sweet and intelligent young woman. There is no doubt in my mind that you're capable of doing your job. The first day you walked into the office to meet with us you were ready for whatever Edward dished out at you and you gave it back to him just as good. I knew then that you could handle him."

"Thanks … I think." I giggled.

"You're welcome, Bella. Just … do me a favor and don't give up on him, okay? Maybe you'll be able to get through to him when the rest of us can't."

"I'm trying, Carlisle. But there is only so much I can take."

"I know that Bella. Remember that Esme and I are here for you too whenever you need us."

"Thanks, Carlisle."

He bid me goodnight and made his way into the house. I felt a little bit better after our conversation, but my head still felt like a jumbled mess. I walked down to the water and let the cool water wash over my toes. I looked up and closed my eyes feeling a sense of calm take over.

"Bella? What are you doing out here all by yourself?" Asked a voice from behind me.

I turned to see Emmett's large figure walking toward me. What was it with these Cullen's?

"I was trying to see if I could clear my head enough to sleep," I replied with a sigh.

"Ahh … yeah, me too. Nothing calms me down like the ocean. I love it here. I wish we could make it down here more often but that is damn near impossible with the schedule we keep."

"I bet." I nodded.

"Rosie and I are planning on coming down here in the off season. We're ready to start a family of our own and we want some time away from Charlotte and racing in general."

"That's great, Emmett. How long have you and Rose been married?"

"Going on three years in April. We were together for two years before we got married."

"You guys are great together. Just like your parents. Your relationship just … works."

Emmett chuckled.

"It is work, Bella. All relationships are. Anything worth fighting for is usually worth it in the end – trust me I know from experience." He grinned.

"Thanks, Emmett."

"You're welcome, Bella. I like having you around … you make Eddie … happy."

I nodded.

"I think I'm gonna head back to the house. Goodnight, Emmett."

"'Night, Bella."

I woke early the next morning with the birds. The night before, sleep had not been easy with everything going on in my head. Over and over I had wondered if the words Edward had said really meant anything or if he had said them just so I'd go back. I was really hoping it wasn't the latter.

After taking a warm shower I got dressed for the day. With my best face on, I grabbed my purse and headed down the stairs. Before my foot hit the bottom step Esme emerged from the kitchen. She smiled but it didn't reach her eyes. I knew she was just as worried about Edward as she was of me.

"Morning, sweetheart. I made breakfast if you're hungry."

"Thank you, Esme, but I'm going to the motor home to see Edward."

"Oh … so you've talked."

"Not exactly. I've agreed to meet him this morning only if he waited till after the race to _really_ talk things out."

"I see."

I sighed. "Esme, I know you are worried for us both, and I'd love to tell you things will be okay, but I can't. Until Edward opens up and talks to me I don't know what will happen. I can only hope things will work out for the best because I care for your son a great deal."

Esme pulled me into her arms. "Oh, Bella ... that's all I can ask is for you to try. I don't know what happened nor do I want to pry but I know without a shadow of a doubt that Edward cares for you very much. My son may be stubborn and take after his father, but he has a big heart."

"Thank you, Esme."

"You're welcome, sweetheart."

"I better go. I'll see you at the race."

"Bye, Bella."

The drive from the beach house to the motor home wasn't a long ride which helped in not dwelling on my decision. The quiet car only heightened my anxiety and my stomach was in knots. _And for what?_ It wasn't like Edward knew my true feelings yet. Oh how I wanted to blurt out that I loved him too but I wasn't ready and neither was he. I was still contemplating if he actually meant the words himself.

After parking my car, I steeled my nerves as best as I could and walked toward the motor home. I knocked softly and was afraid he hadn't heard but then the door opened and there Edward stood. His hair was a mess and he had dark circles under his eyes; but God, even when he looked as bad as I felt he was still the sexiest man I had laid eyes upon.

"Hey," Edward said in a strangled whisper.

"Hey."

Edward opened the door wider so I could pass through. I stood there looking around not sure what to do. I wanted to pull him in my arms and tell him I loved him. I wanted him to say everything was going to be okay and that he truly loved me too. My heart ached and I just wanted the pain to go away.

"Even after you said you'd come I was still afraid you wouldn't show."

"I said I'd be here and I'm here. Edward … I'd never lie to you. Even as unhappy as I am with you right now."

"I never meant to hurt you, Bella. I'm sorry."

"Are you?"

Edward was taken aback by my words. His back straight, his shoulders were stiff as he stood frozen in place, eyes wide.

"Bella … I truly am sorry. Those words I said to you last night I meant. I love you and I would never intentionally hurt you."

"Well you have a funny way of showing it."

In an instant Edward was nose to nose with me. His emerald eyes shone with guilt, hurt but most of all with love.

"Baby, I'm trying here. I know I was a complete dick and treated you like shit but you have to know you are the most important thing in my life. I can't do this without you. I want the chance to make this right. I want to tell you everything. I promise after the race."

"Okay …."

Over coffee, scrambled eggs and toast, Edward and I talked about the race later that day and we touched on his foundation that I hoped we could start promoting in earnest in the next month or so. Tension surrounded us, but not so much that it was stifling. I offered to clean up while he changed and got ready to head over to the hauler for his morning briefing.

"Where are you going to be?" Edward asked softly as I gathered up my things.

"I'll be up in the skybox with your mom, Alice, and Rose."

Edward nodded.

"Thank you, Bella."

"You're welcome."

I closed the distance between us, taking his hand in mine and kissing his cheek softly.

"Be safe and drive fast."

I turned and left the motor home without another word. I had a few things I wanted to check on before I headed up to the skybox. Alice caught up with me not far from Edward's motor home and she agreed to come with me.

"How's Edward this morning?"

"He's okay."

"Is his head going to be in the race today or will he be thinking about how he screwed up with you?"

I sighed.

"I honestly don't know, Alice. He knows he screwed up. He was so apologetic and sweet this morning. I've agreed to hear him out after the race so he knows I'm not going anywhere … yet."

"You're so patient, Bella. Not many women would have given him the chance to explain."

"I know, but I also know that not many women would have been so tolerant with his shit either. He's hiding something huge behind that wall of his, Alice. I can feel it in my bones. I just hope that Edward and I are both left standing once he lets down that wall."

"Me too, Bella. Me too. But no matter what happens, I'm here for you."

"Thanks, Ali."

We made our way over to the merchandise trailer on the midway. I wanted to see how well the new merchandise wasselling. The lines were long but seemed to be moving which was good. A few of the collectable items such as the die-cast cars that Edward had autographed were completely sold out.

A couple of fans smiled at me as they passed by, noticing that I was wearing a team polo and lanyard.

"I think this kid's gonna do well this year … he's definitely one to watch." A fan smiled as he walked away reading his program.

I looked at Alice and she shrugged.

"At least the fans like him …." She offered.

Eventually we made our way up to the skybox. Esme was still down on pit road with Carlisle waiting for the Invocation and the National Anthem. The race was supposed to start at noon and officials were eager to get the race underway. Unfortunately, the skies opened up again and all we could do was watch from our skybox as we waited to hear from NASCAR.

My phone buzzed with a text message.

_Race is being postponed again until 7pm tonight. Can we talk now? – E_

I texted him back immediately.

_Are you sure that's a good idea? You need to focus on the race. – B_

His response was quick_._

_I'll be more focused after we talk. I promise. – E_

I made my way back to the infield from the skybox with Alice in tow. The guys were still working on putting everything away to keep it out of the rain. I met Edward at the hauler where he was changing out of his tracksuit and back into his jeans and polo. Esme gave me a sad look – she knew we were going back to the motor home to talk.

"Do you want something to drink?" Edward asked as he pulled a Gatorade out of the fridge.

"Water's fine."

We sat down on the couch – a cushion length separating us. I looked at Edward expectantly as he worked out in his head where he wanted to begin.

"Bella … I'm going to tell you … everything. Just promise me that you'll let me get out what I have to say before commenting or passing judgment, because if you don't – I don't know that I'll be able to get it all out."

Maybe this was harder for him than I imagined.

"I promise," I whispered.

He pinched the bridge of his nose with his long fingers before raking them through his hair. He took a deep breath and exhaled quickly.

"I met Kate a few weeks after I graduated high school. I was racing at a dirt track in South Carolina and she was there with her friends. At first, I thought she was beautiful," he said shaking his head. "But I was so naïve. I learned the hard way that her beauty was only skin deep.

"I had been thinking about going to college and only doing racing part time. Of course, my dad had other ideas. He wanted me to race and race hard. He wanted me to be where I am now, but I didn't want that. You know that I play piano and I started when I was a kid. My mom thought that Emmett and I needed to be "well rounded kids" – no matter what life handed us. But I really loved it. I felt powerful when I played because it was something I controlled.

"I told Kate all about the piano. She begged me to play for her and when I did she helped convince me that I needed to pursue it. She had a friend who showed me the ins and outs of applying to college for grants and financial aid. I wanted to go – but I wanted to do it my way. I didn't want to ask my parents for the money. When I had everything set up – an apartment, my classes – everything; I left my parent's house and their control."

Edward stopped for a moment and his brows furrowed.

"I hurt my mom so badly when I did that. I didn't even say goodbye – I just left. Kate and I moved into our apartment and everything was great. I loved school and I did really well. There were so many times that I wanted to pick up the phone and tell my parents what I was doing because I wanted them to be proud of me but I figured they would only be angry, so I let it go.

"I was about half way through my third year of college when Kate told me that she was pregnant. I was so happy. Freaked out – but happy. At the time I imagined having this happy little family. I thought I was in a really good place. I'd be graduating the next year and I had a couple of job prospects for when I graduated. I had planned on proposing to Kate the day I graduated. I thought I was so in love with her."

So the "friend" he'd told me about was so much more than a friend and the little boy was Edward's son. Everything began to click in my brain but I had to let Edward finish his story.

"Lucas was born in July and I was so excited that I could finally hold him. I thought that he was the most amazing thing I'd ever done in my life. Every day I fell a little more in love with him. I thought he was my son for fuck's sake, and there wasn't anything that I wouldn't have done for him. I started noticing little things; he didn't always respond to my voice, and then I paid attention when Kate was with him and he wouldn't respond to her either. I finally convinced her that we needed to take him in for a hearing test. He'd had one when he was first born and it was fine, but it was obvious that things had changed since then. When it was confirmed that Lucas was completely deaf, Kate took it very badly. She felt like she had failed because she wasn't the one who noticed it. Anyway, one morning I went to class and when I came home that afternoon, the babysitter was sitting there with Lucas and she said that Kate had left a note on the counter for me. She said she was leaving and that she wasn't coming back because she couldn't deal with the stress of having a deaf child. She wasn't up to the task of having to learn an entirely different language to communicate with our son.

"I couldn't not communicate with him, so I began to make appointments with doctors to see what could be done. I was referred to a specialist in Atlanta, and they told me to bring all the required paperwork with me. I took the envelope I knew had his birth certificate in it and everything else – immunization records, test results – everything. I handed the paperwork over and let them deal with it since Lucas was being fussy. The billing secretary was actually the one who pointed out to me that I wasn't on Lucas's birth certificate. She told me that they couldn't actually do any further testing on him until they had confirmation that I was indeed his father."

The expression on Edward's face was killing me. I'd have given anything to be able to reach out and comfort him. Yes … what he had to tell me was much, much worse than I'd ever imagined. How in the world could a mother just up and leave her child – especially when he had lost one of his senses. I couldn't fathom not being able to hear; but to lose my hearing and then my mother not long after. My heart broke for that little boy. No wonder Edward was so passionate about wanting to start his charity for deaf kids.

"I decided to let them run a paternity test. We stayed in Atlanta for three days waiting for the results to come back only for them to tell me that I wasn't Lucas's father. I was so pissed. Angry that Kate left us because she couldn't handle things, angry because she'd lied to me. She'd cheated on me and passed her son off as mine. Jesus … I never questioned it because Lucas looked like her. Toe head blond with big blue eyes. He was an adorable little boy and I wanted so badly for him to be mine. I … I didn't know what else to do. The clinic in Atlanta couldn't do anything for him because I wasn't his biological father so I brought Lucas home to Charlotte and took him to Kate's parent's house. I explained everything to them right down to her leaving and Lucas not being my son. They promised that they'd take care of him and I walked out.

"I went back to school and I graduated a few months later. I only finished because I had worked so hard to get there in the first place but I had no desire to pursue music because it only reminded me of Kate and Lucas. I'd sit and play the piano for him for hours – when she was pregnant with him and even after he was born. He had colic as a newborn and the music seemed to soothe him. But I decided I needed to get away from that. I ended up tucking my tail between my legs and coming back to my parents. It's been almost a year since I graduated, but you're the first person besides Kate and her parents that knows where I've been."

Edward hung his head in his hands and I knew that he was pretty much talked out.

"Wow, Edward. I'm so sorry those things happened to you."

It sounded lame as I said it and even worse because it didn't at all convey how I felt about it. It was the first thing I thought of and it wasn't nearly enough.

"I can't even begin to imagine," I said, shaking my head.

"Do you hate me?" Edward asked quietly.

I closed the distance between us and took his hands in mine.

"Edward … no, I don't hate you. Nor do I think less of you because of what you did. You did something for yourself … something wonderful. No one can fault you for getting an education. Especially in the field that you're in now … your life could change in an instant. You may have an accident and never be able to race again – but you can teach and that's a wonderful gift to give, Edward."

"How could I have been so stupid?" Edward berated himself.

"You were young and naïve. It's happened to all of us at one point or another, Edward. Baby … you are such a wonderful man to have stepped up to the plate to take care of that baby. You loved Kate, you had faith in her and you did what you felt you needed to do – to do what was right. Maybe Kate was a mistake but taking responsibility wasn't."

Edward nodded.

"So that's it … that's the reason why you were so upset after you saw Kate. I take it that's the first time you've seen her since she left?"

"Yeah. I'm shocked I didn't bump into her sooner but Jesus, of all places for her to show up – she had to show up here. She knew I was working, and then you were standing right there and I hadn't even told you about her yet."

"Did she say why she was here?"

"She gave some lame excuse that she had things to say and she was sorry. She probably saw my name and thought she could weasel her way back into my life again. I wouldn't put it past her if she was here looking for money."

"Jesus, Edward. Do you think she'd stoop that low?"

Edward shrugged. "Who knows?"

"Let's hope she's gone back to where she came from. You don't need the bad publicity, that's for sure."

"Bella … I couldn't give two shits about the publicity. What I care about is you and what you think."

I pulled his face between my hands and looked deeply into his eyes. "Nothing that happened with Kate changes how I feel about you. Yes, I was hurt and pissed for the way you treated me, but I don't think any less of you. If we're going to make this work between us, you need to talk to me. I know why you were scared to tell me Edward, but I … I love you. You have to learn to trust me. Us."

"Oh, God … Bella. You have no idea how happy I am to hear those words. I love you so much. I thought I really fucked up and lost you forever. I swear I'll talk to you next time. I'm sorry."

"I know, Edward. No more apologizing. Okay?"

"Okay."

I brushed my lips against his. No more than a mingling of breath but it was just enough to stir emotions I had been holding in. I missed my Edward more than he would ever know.

"I love you, Bella."

"I love you, too. Now, you have a race to run – try to relax for a bit."

"Yes, ma'am."

We spent the rest of the afternoon lazing in each other's arms. It would have been the perfect way to spend a rainy afternoon if we weren't sitting in a motor home parked in the infield of Daytona International Speedway waiting for the rain to stop so the Daytona 500 could get underway.

As it got closer to go time, I kissed Edward's lips once more before wishing him good luck and walking out the door and back to the skybox. Our relationship was far from being perfect, but it was a huge start that he opened up and talked to me.

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**A/N: So now we know all about Kate ... and Edward for that matter. Did it go how y'all expected? Leave us some love ... we can't wait to see what you think!**

**Story Rec: When You Least Expect it by Kare831 - it's a WIP that updates every Monday and the first 18 chapters are already written.**

**Kare831: You know ... I hate pimping my own stuff ...**

**twimom817: Yeah, but you need to pimp this one because it's REALLY REALLY GOOD!**

**Kare831: Aww garwsh ... well there you have it ... it's been pimped.**

**twimom817: Yay! I'm sure everyone will love it as much as I do!**

**Kare831: Edward help me! LOL**


	5. Chapter 5

All things Twilight belong to Stephenie Meyer; We just like to play with her characters.

No copyright infringement is intended.

HUGE thanks to darcysmom and EdwardsmyObsession1971 for beta'ing and pre-reading. We couldn't do this without you ladies!

* * *

**In High Gear**

**Chapter Five**

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**EPOV**

It was freeing to finally purge all of my secrets about why I'd run away from my family and gone to college. Kate was a skeleton in my closet and she managed to show herself to Bella so it was only fair that I come clean as well.

I knew from the beginning that I'd have to tell Bella everything and I was planning on it – but I wasn't planning on it being the weekend of the Daytona 500. Never in my wildest dreams did I think that Kate would show up and ask to talk to me.

Bella leaving my motor home was an eye-opening experience. In my haze of anger caused by Kate, I hadn't realized that I was being a total shit to Bella. She was smart and knew something was up, but I was naïve to think that she'd let it slide until the weekend was over. She called me out on my bullshit and I'd never loved her more, but when she stepped out of my motor home, I was completely heartbroken.

I tossed and turned that night. I kept running scenarios over and over in my head about what Bella's reaction would be and I couldn't gage how it would go – at all. I was nervous about seeing her for breakfast. I didn't want to screw up more with her than I already had. I could only hope that she'd stick around after the race to hear me out.

I was happy to see her at breakfast, but she looked tired – like she hadn't slept at all. When I talked to mom earlier that morning, she said that Bella had spent a great deal of time out on the beach and she'd talked to both my dad and Emmett but mom wasn't sure what they had talked about per se. My heart panged at the thought of Bella out on the beach all alone at night and I wanted to be there with her – holding her hand in mine. The time that we had spent on that same beach suddenly seemed so very long ago.

I went through the motions of the team meeting and drivers meeting that morning. We were told that there was more rain on the way and it was quite possible that there would be another delay in the race. If that were to happen, we were told that we'd race under the lights that evening.

That left me all afternoon to stew. I decided to be proactive with my time and I texted Bella asking her to meet me at the hauler and asked her if we could talk before the race since I had the time. I knew she was probably worried about my state of mind after purging all my indiscretions – I was too if I was honest with myself. I don't know what I would have done if Bella felt that I got what I deserved after leaving my family and pursuing Kate.

Thankfully, she understood. I felt horrible for doubting that she wouldn't, but the fear was real. Bella told me that Kate may have been a mistake but stepping up and taking care of Lucas wasn't. It was then that I knew that Bella got it. She didn't hate me or think ill of me. She knew that I did what I did because I had to. I was young and I made a mistake. I intended to learn from it so I put a wall up and tried to act like an asshole – someone who was so far away from whom I truly was.

I shook my head as I walked to the hauler once again. I knew I was lucky to have Bella and I knew I'd do everything within my power to keep her from regretting a relationship with me.

"Everything okay with you and Bella?" Dad asked as I walked into the hauler.

"We talked if that's what you're asking."

"No … I'm asking if you two are okay. Bella was pretty upset last night. She's a sweet girl. I didn't like seeing her like that."

"Me either, Dad. I was an asshole but I'm doing my best to make it right. We talked and I think we're going to be okay."

"She's good for you," Dad grinned. "She keeps you in check."

"She does," I chuckled.

"Ready to race?" He asked, switching from concerned father to team owner.

"Hell yeah. Is the track ready to go?"

"They've got the jet dryers out but it stopped raining a couple hours ago. They want to make sure it's good and dry before any cars hit the track."

Nearly an hour later, I was suited up and climbing into my car.

"Let's do this Ed. Pit road speed is 55 in second gear. NASCAR is asking if you see any seepage on the track to let us know so we can let them know."

"10-4."

I got in line as the pace car led us off of pit road and we made a few laps around the track.

"Track looks dry from where I'm sitting," I radioed in.

"10-4. They're going to take you around a few more laps before going green."

"10-4."

"200 laps boys, let's have a good run tonight."

The pace car pulled off pit road and the green flag waved. I fell in behind Dale Jr. and drafted with him staying up front with the faster cars. I was settling in when I heard my spotter.

"Cautions out, cautions out. They're wrecking behind you. Looks like five cars were involved."

"10-4."

"Hey, Ed …." Jasper radioed, "When pit road opens come on in – we'll do fuel and tires."

"10-4. My temps are good but I could use a little something … it's a loose in."

"10-4."

We circled the track, carefully avoiding the wreck before entering pit road.

"You're 5, 4, 3, 2 … wheels straight foot on the brake."

I didn't have to wait long as my team serviced my car. I listened to the radio as they listed off the cars that were involved in the wreck that caused the caution. So many big name drivers were involved it was almost hard to believe. I took off out of my pit stall when my team finished and I'd moved up two spots.

"They're going green again next lap."

I watched as the pace car once again pulled onto pit road and 36 cars picked up speed.

The race was smooth sailing until lap 160 when Juan Montoya pitted under caution saying he thought he was having some problems with his transmission. When Montoya returned to the track shortly after, he radioed in saying that he'd had a vibration. He lost control at the entrance to turn three and slammed into a jet dryer. The accident caused a huge explosion, catching the truck pulling the jet dryer on fire. Jet fuel used to power the jet dryer leaked down the track and ignited as well. The race was soon red flagged and it took clean-up crews nearly two hours to clean up the mess.

"What a day!" Jasper joked over the radio.

"No shit … just when I didn't think it could get any worse … it did."

"Ed … don't worry man … Bella's up in the sky box. She's with Alice and Esme. She'll still be here when the race is over."

"Nah … I'm not worried about that."

One of my crew followed me back out to my car and helped me get buckled in. They gave us the command to fire our engines again and we slowly filed in behind the pace car once again. When the green flag finally waved, we'd barely been around the track once when there was another wreck … this time it involved Jimmie Johnson and took him out of the race completely. That particular wreck took out another six cars.

After that the rest of the race went by without a hitch … there were a couple more cautions because of debris on the track. Once again, I was following Dale Jr. and we had a good draft going when he slingshotted around Greg Biffle in an attempt to catch up with Matt Kenseth who ended up winning the race. I managed to pull out a fourth place finish. Not bad at all for my first Daytona 500.

"Great job out there today, Ed!" Jasper praised over the radio.

I had to stick around pit road for a few trackside interviews, but I was anxious to get back to the hauler to see Bella.

"You did great out there today, Son." Dad grinned.

"Thanks, Dad."

"I mean it, Edward. You raced hard and you certainly raced well. We went in with no expectations and you came out a winner even if you placed fourth."

"Thanks again, Dad. That really means a lot."

He slapped a hand on my shoulder. "You made your old man proud out there."

A lump caught in my throat and all I could do was nod. Dad smiled and then motioned to where Mom and Bella were heading our way.

"With a finish like that the sponsors should be happy."

I smiled. "You think?"

Bella nodded.

"We'll leave you two," Dad said with a smile before wrapping an arm around Mom's shoulder and walking off.

Bella closed the gap and wrapped her arms around my neck looking beautiful as ever.

"Bella …"

"Hey ... you had me a little worried out there for a while, but you held your ground and handled your car like a champ. I'm proud of you."

For the second time today I was choked up with all the emotion of people supporting me. I finally found my voice. "Thank you."

I kissed her lips sweetly before pulling back to look into her eyes. "Will you come back to the motor home? I don't think I could spend another night without you in my arms."

"Well … I didn't sleep a wink at the beach house."

"Then please … come back to the motor home."

"You know you didn't have to beg, Edward. I was going back no matter what. I belong where ever you are."

"God, I love you so much, Bella."

"I love you, too."

I wrapped an arm around her shoulder pulling her close to my side as we walked back to the motor home. We were staying here one more night before heading to our next race in Phoenix. I planned on showing Bella all night just how much I loved her. If I had my way we'd be in bed for days but that wasn't an option, so I'd take all night instead.

I opened the door and gestured for Bella to go in. As soon as I closed and locked the door behind us I turned and pulled Bella in my arms. My lips descended on hers. Her lips tasted like Cherry Coke.

My tongue swept along her lips taking in her sweet taste before she opened her mouth to allow my tongue to slip in and caress hers. I pushed my hands in her hair to hold her lips to mine, taking everything she gave. Bella whimpered as our lips moved against each other's while we both fought for dominance of the kiss. It seemed Bella was just as needy as I was.

I pulled back resting my forehead against hers wanting to let her know all my feelings before we got too wrapped up in each other. There wasn't a chance in hell I was holding anything back again.

"Baby, yesterday was one of the worst days of my life. When you walked out of the motor home, I thought you were walking away from me. _From us_. I never want to go through that again. I'm so sorry. I'll never keep anything from you again. I love you more than my next breath."

"Edward, I love you, too. No more apologizing, okay? I forgave you and as long as we're open with each other, that's all that matters. Now … more kissing."

"Yes ma'am."

I kissed her hard, but her lips were still soft and warm against mine. Framing Bella's face in my hands, I kissed her for long minutes before I dragged my open mouth down her neck. Her soft moans gave me satisfaction that she was just as affected as I was.

"Christ, I've missed you."

"I've missed you too."

"Baby, you have no idea how much I want you right now."

Bella's hand found my aching cock as she squeezed and rubbed it through my suit.

"Oh, I think I have an idea."

"Jesus, Bella."

My hands were everywhere, molding to her body like I needed to remember just how she felt under my fingers. I hastily tried to lift her shirt over her head as she continued to stroke my cock. Next her bra hit the floor before I took a nipple in my mouth. I nibbled, licked and sucked until it was wet and hard before moving on to the other one. Bella fumbled to get the zipper down on my suit, barely managing to get it over my shoulders and down my arms before I hauled her over my shoulder and stalked toward the bedroom.

Bella fell to the bed in a fit of giggles as I gently threw her on it. The sound of her giggles made me all warm inside; knowing I made her happy made my heart full. After getting rid of the rest of my clothes I kneeled on the mattress and looked down at Bella. She was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. With little effort I tugged her jeans down, taking her panties with them, leaving her completely naked and open.

"You're so beautiful, Bella."

I settled between her legs as I leaned down and took a languid lick of her pussy. She tasted sweet and salty and everything like _my_ Bella. I parted her swollen flesh before taking her clit in my mouth.

"Oh, God … Edward …"

I licked and sucked coaxing whimpers of pleasure out of Bella's mouth. She was sexy as hell when she was in the throes of passion.

"Please … please, I need you inside me."

_She didn't have to tell me twice_. With my cock in hand I rolled a condom on then positioned myself at her entrance. I slipped in just past the crest, teasing her with a little stroke, making sure she was ready.

"I love you so much, Bella."

My eyes never left hers as I eased my cock inch by inch until I had entered her fully. I sighed at finally being together again with Bella. She clenched her muscles, causing me to groan and I knew she wanted me to move.

"Baby, you feel so good. I've missed this."

Bella wrapped her legs around my hips as I started pumping my hips in a steady rhythm. I covered her lips with mine, coaxing and tasting while our bodies moved against the other. Her legs tightened at my hips as she lifted her hips slowly meeting my thrusts in a delicious, sensual ride. Each stoke was faster and faster as the pressure built low in my belly.

"I'm not gonna last, baby."

"So … close."

With another thrust of my hips Bella clenched around me, screaming my name as her orgasm rocked her. Her name slipped from my lips as my own orgasm was not far behind. It took us a few minutes to catch our breaths before I collapsed in bed next to Bella. I slipped out of bed to discard the condom before pulling the covers over us. Bella snuggled into my side and rested her head on my chest just above my heart.

We laid in each other's arms content to be wrapped in the warmth of each other. I pulled her close and kissed her temple letting the emotions of the last few days wash away. What was wrapped in these arms was my love, my life. She was the piece I've been missing and I wasn't letting her go.

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A/N: HUGE thanks to Evilnat for nominating Taking a Shot for Fic of the week at tehlemonadestand -

Kare831's story When You Least Expect It was also nominated - if you get a chance it's the last few hours of voting GO VOTE!

Leave us some love, we can't wait to hear your thoughts!


	6. Chapter 6

All things Twilight belong to Stephenie Meyer; we just like to play with her characters.

No copyright infringement is intended.

HUGE thanks to darcysmom for her stealthy beta skills. No one edits on the fly better than she does. =D

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In High Gear

Chapter Six

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The weeks following the race at Daytona flashed by in a blur of practices, races, promotional appearances, and commercials shoots. Dr. Pepper was so happy to have gotten a top five finish at Daytona that they asked to make a few changes to my contract. Yeah, it involved doing more promotional stuff, but Bella promised me that it would mean more to me and my team in the long run if I did it.

"Edward … look at it this way – if you do this now and you continue to race well – you could have an even bigger sponsor offer at the end of the season. Sponsors mean more money to spend on equipment and better equipment means faster cars … you see where I'm going with this?"

"Yeah, baby, I see where you're going with this and you're right. I just don't want to get overwhelmed. I want to be able to race and do it well – but I also want time for us. I want to spend time with you Bella. We can't build a relationship if we're only seeing each other once a week for a few hours."

Maybe I was whining, but I didn't care. Since we got home from Daytona, Bella was busy with her job and I was busy with mine. It left us very little time to see each other. Sure we could talk on the phone or text but it wasn't the same as seeing each other. I needed to be with her like I needed air to breathe.

We were a month into the season and getting ready to race at Martinsville Speedway in Virginia. I'd been to the track as a kid and it was an entirely different experience behind the wheel. I begged Bella to make the short trip from North Carolina with me. I knew that I couldn't take her away from her job to bring her along to all of my races, but I hoped that she'd come to all the ones that were closer to home.

Because of the size of the track, our motor homes were in a lot adjacent to the track. Martinsville is a half-mile paperclip and there is no way to fit forty-three haulers and motor homes into the infield. It was a tight fit with just the haulers, and I was thankful that I didn't have to drive the tractor and drive the trailer in.

Bella and I rode up from Charlotte in the motor home. It was only about a two and a half hour drive. We could have taken the plane with everyone else, but I wanted time with Bella away from everyone else.

"Baby … I need to work," Bella giggled as I kissed her neck.

She was sitting at the table in the motor home working on something as we made our way down the highway, and I really wanted to distract her.

"Come back to the bedroom and lay down with me for a bit. I've hardly seen you in the last three weeks."

"Edward … we knew this wasn't going to be easy. You have a job and I have a job – that's just how it is. We don't have to like it, but we can't give up on them because we want to be with each other. Please, baby? I'm almost done with this … just be patient for a little bit longer."

Bella pleaded with me and it took all I had not to argue with her. I wanted to feel her next to me, skin on skin. I needed that contact with her again.

"How many clients do you have besides Cullen Motorsports?" I asked out of the blue.

Bella frowned and looked at me.

"I have three other clients, Edward. I took on this new one because they begged me to do it. Apparently, I was highly recommended by your father."

Leave it to Dad to recommend Bella. Granted she was doing a kick ass job for me and the rest of Cullen Motorsports, but more clients meant she had less time.

"Also …" Bella said softly, breaking me out of my thoughts. "We need to schedule a meeting to discuss your charity. NASCAR Day will be here before you know it and there are still a lot of things to decide on and finalize. I talked about it a little bit with your mom and she would love to be involved with this, Edward."

I knew what she was getting at. My mom being involved with my charity meant that I would have to explain to her why I had chosen Hear the Music. My mom was too intuitive and she would know that it went much deeper than my love for music. I'd have to come clean with both of my parents. Bella did her best to assure me that my parents would understand – that they wouldn't hate me for what happened.

"I know, I guess … I guess I should tell them and get it over with."

"Edward … you make it sound like a death march. They'll understand and if they're anything like me – they'll be proud of you. Baby, you did the best you could with what you had to work with. It's not your fault that Kate left, and it's certainly not your fault that her son was deaf. You loved him because you thought he was yours, and when you found out that he wasn't and you couldn't help him – you did the next best thing – you took him to people who could. It takes a good person with a big heart to do that, Edward. You could have just left him at the hospital, but you didn't."

I shook my head.

"No, I didn't. I couldn't have done that. By that time, I'd already bonded with him. It felt like he was mine …. my mom will be so upset … first she'll think that she had a grandchild and before she could even get to know him – he was gone – never hers in the first place."

"She won't think that, Edward. Your mom knows that things happen for a reason. I promise you – she'll understand."

I sighed and turned toward the back of the motor home, leaving Bella to her paperwork. I lay down on the comfortable bed – my thoughts swirling in my head. I must have fallen asleep, because I woke to sweet kisses on my cheek.

"Wake up, handsome," Bella whispered.

"How long have I been asleep?"

"Maybe thirty minutes?"

I rolled to my side to gaze into the warm chocolate eyes I loved so much and I smiled.

"Were you watching me sleep?"

"Maybe," Bella grinned. "Can you blame me? You're so peaceful when you sleep, handsome."

I kissed Bella's forehead softly because I knew exactly what she was talking about. I gathered her up in my arms and brushed my lips against hers.

"Edward … we're almost there. I really would like to wait for … this until we're alone. No driver – just us. Okay?"

If that's what Bella wanted – I could wait.

I nodded and settled for a chaste kiss upon her lips.

I was drifting off to sleep again when I heard Rick, my motor home driver, holler that we had arrived and he was going to get us all set up. Bella rubbed at her eyes sleepily and sat up on the bed.

"Tired, beautiful?"

"Yeah … I guess I didn't realize how tired I really was until I came in here and laid down with you. I've been so busy and with you on the road … I haven't been sleeping as well as I could be."

"I know, baby … I'm not sleeping all that great either. The few nights we had together in Daytona spoiled us I think."

Bella's stomach grumbled, and I knew I needed to get her fed. It probably helped that I was starving too. We freshened up and met with my parents and went to a little mom and pop restaurant that I remembered going to as a kid. It was a staple in the NASCAR community when we raced in Martinsville apparently because there were several other drivers and their families there as well.

"Did you two enjoy the drive up?" My mom asked.

"Bella worked pretty much the entire drive so I wouldn't use the word enjoy to describe our trip."

"Edward …." My mom chided. "Bella has a career too, honey. I'm sure that she has accounts other than Cullen Motorsports to work on and we can't take her away from those obligations."

"Speaking of obligations … we need to discuss Hear the Music – Edward's charity he's decided on for NASCAR Day. Esme, I know you've expressed interest in helping out and honestly – I'd be happy to have your help. I think it's important to structure it well – we want it to thrive and be around for deaf kids who have interest in music for years to come – well after Edward retires from racing."

I knew that Bella meant well in bringing up the subject. It was not her intention to throw me under the bus so to speak. I knew the charity and setting everything up was a bit daunting for her – like she said, we wanted it to thrive and if it was poorly managed there was no way for that to happen. My mom was instrumental in setting up my dad's charity when he started racing and I honestly couldn't think of a better person for Bella to ask for help.

It still didn't stop me from feeling like I had been fed to the wolves. I know my parents would want me to explain why I was so passionate about this particular charity and my dad certainly didn't disappoint.

"So … Edward … why a music charity for deaf kids? I'm not criticizing – I'm merely curious."

I sighed and glanced over at Bella. Her expression was sad, and she probably wanted to apologize but it wasn't the time.

"Why not? Mom wanted us to learn music for a reason. Music broadened our horizons and gave us a little bit of culture in our lives. Why shouldn't other kids be offered those same opportunities just because they can't hear? There have been so many advancements in education that helps deaf children experience music."

"Sweetheart, I'm so happy that you're so passionate about your charity – but I can't help but think there's more to it. I know you, Edward – you do everything for a reason and you always have so what's the reason behind Hear the Music?"

There it was. Damn my mom for being all knowing.

Bella slid over closer to me and slid her hand into mine giving it a slight squeeze. I pinched the bridge of my nose and took a deep breath. Exhaling quickly I decided it was now or never.

"Mom … Dad … there's something I need to tell you guys …"

I launched into the same explanation that I'd given Bella only weeks before and I hoped beyond all hope that my parents would understand. Thankfully, they listened patiently as I explained every detail – giving them my reasons for walking away from racing with Kate and how I went to college and pursued a degree in music. I told them how Kate had gotten pregnant and how happy I was at the prospect of having a child only to have my happiness shattered into a million pieces when Kate left and then later found out that the child wasn't even mine to begin with.

"My God …." My father whispered.

I looked up to see my mom's eyes filled with tears.

"Edward … sweetheart … why didn't you call us? I … I can't even imagine you having to go through all that alone. You should have called us – we would have helped you."

"Mom … I honestly thought you'd be disappointed. I wanted to do it on my own to prove that I could. I don't know … I thought I could redeem myself somehow if I could make it on my own and finish school with a baby that I was trying to raise on my own. When I found out he wasn't mine … it nearly broke me. I was already so attached to him. It was the worst feeling handing him over to Kate's parents, but it was the right thing to do since I had no legal rights to him. I was lucky the hospital agreed to let me bring him back to North Carolina with me. They almost didn't."

"Son, what you did … well it takes a good man to do that. The way you've acted since coming back … it all makes sense now."

Dad turned to look at Bella.

"Bella … did you know about all this?"

Bella shook her head and nodded.

"Yeah … Edward told me about it at Daytona."

Dad looked at me in confusion. He probably wanted to know why I chose Daytona, of all places, to explain something so serious to Bella.

"Kate showed up at one of the signings in Daytona. That's why Bella was so upset with me. I begged her to let me explain and thankfully she did."

"Carlisle … Esme … after Edward explained what happened – there was no way I could be angry with him. What Kate did was awful, and I couldn't blame him for his reaction. No one deserves that."

I hung my head, letting the feeling of relief of finally getting everything out in the open wash over me. I was so glad not to have my secrets hanging on my shoulders any longer. The next thing I knew, my mom was pulling me into her arms as she continued to sob.

"You are such a good man, sweetheart. I could never be disappointed in you. You always try to do the right thing even if you lose your footing a little bit along the way."

"Edward, as much as I wish you would have called us I am still proud of you, son. Always know that you can come to us and we love you no matter what."

"Your father's right, sweetheart."

"I know that now, but then I just felt ashamed and a failure as a son."

"Oh, Edward … we don't ever want you to feel that way - our love is unconditional, we're here for you always. Promise you'll talk to us next time instead of shutting us out."

"I promise, Mom."

Bella squeezed my hand under the table and I looked over to see a beautiful smile, and love shone on her face. Her eyes twinkled as if to say _see I told you everything would be okay, _and everything would be as long as she was by my side.

In that moment all I wanted to do was get lost in Bella. No more lingering secrets or past faults - just Bella and me in each other's arms. As if sensing where my thoughts had gone, Bella squeezed my hand again.

"Mom, Dad, I hope you don't mind if Bella and I head back to the motor home. I'm exhausted and need to get some rest. I'm sure Bella's tired too."

"Of course, son. We'll see you at the track for practice tomorrow."

With one last hug and goodbye to my parents, Bella and I were out the door. I wrapped my arm around Bella's shoulders and pulled her close, kissing her temple.

"Thank you, baby."

"For what?"

"For being there for me. I don't think I could have gotten through that without you. I love you so damn much, Bella."

"I love you too, Edward."

"Let's go home."

It didn't take long before we were walking into the motor home. As soon as the door was closed and locked, I had Bella in my arms and my mouth on hers. It had felt like months since I had her in my arms this way.

Her lips were warm and soft and tasted like peaches from the tea she had earlier. They were pliant as they moved against mine and I slipped my tongue in to tangle with hers. Bella angled her head as I deepened the kiss. A soft moan left her lips as mine trailed down her jaw and neck to the juncture of her shoulder and back up again to place a kiss behind her ear.

Bella moaned again and my heart slammed against my chest matching the throb in my groin. There was this need to make it last, take it slow, but I wasn't sure I could. Her body was hot against mine, aligned in all the right places. The little minx rocked against me knowing all too well what she was doing to me.

"Bella …"

My hands cupped the curvess of her ass as I lifted her up while her legs wrapped around my waist. Bella was trailing kissing along my neck igniting a fire within me. I wanted her, no needed her more than my next breath.

I walked us to the bedroom and unceremoniously dropped her on the bed then kneeled before her. I started at her feet and slowly undressed her piece by piece. When she was gloriously naked, I stepped back to take in every inch of her beautiful body. Bella sat up trying to hide herself but I was having none of that. I grabbed her wrists to stop her.

"Don't. You're beautiful, Bella. I want to see all of you."

She relaxed, laying back and spread her legs just enough giving me a prefect view of how aroused she was. I licked my lips with the thought of tasting her.

"So beautiful."

"Edward ..."

"Patience, my love."

I stripped out of my own clothes and lay beside her on the bed. My hands explored every inch of her soft curves before my lips made the same journey. When I was poised over her glistening sex, I glanced up to see her lust filled eyes and pouty mouth.

My gaze dropped to the apex of her thighs before I leaned closer, flattening my tongue and stroked her hardened nub. Bella moaned as I took her clit in my mouth and sucked. I pushed two fingers inside while my lips still moved along her pink folds.

Bella was thrashing and moaning, her breaths heavy. I could feel she was close but she was fighting the pleasure as it over took her body.

"Edward … please, I need you inside me."

_Ah._ She didn't need to tell me twice. My cock was hard and throbbing and wanted inside her just as much as she wanted.

I donned a condom before crawling up the bed to settle between her legs. I slid the tip of my cock through her wet folds teasing her. "Is this what you want, baby?

"Yes … please."

She tilted her hips and lifted her knees as I sank deep into her warmth till I was completely filling her.

"Oh, God … Bella … you feel so good."

"Edward …"

She wrapped her legs around my waist, digging her heels in my ass causing me to go even deeper. With slow strokes I thrust in and out of her in a delicious rhythm, each thrust in causing her to whimper as her clit grazed my pelvic bone. I'd bury myself in her, hitting just the right spot for my name to roll off her sweet lips.

She was close. I could feel the flutter of her muscles as they tightened on my cock. I could feel the same pull low in my belly as I struggled to last a bit longer.

"Oh God … Edward! I'm gonna … I'm gonna … come," Bella whimpered.

She cried out as I drove into her one more time, then I was coming as my own release washed over me. My lips latched onto Bella's as I rode out my orgasm.

Exhausted and spent, I collapsed on the mattress beside Bella as I tried to catch my breath.

"Jesus, Bella."

"Umm … yeah … wow."

"I love you, baby."

"I love you, too, Edward."

I placed a kiss on her temple and we drifted off to sleep. That night we slept in each other's arms with no worries of the upcoming race in our minds.

* * *

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